Fields of Screams: 2017 youth baseball/softball thread

2-3 more times. Plus, Sunday is Mother's Day.

 

Heh. Your whole team has Mother's Day parties to go to. Perfect.

 

Well, it's only inevitable I guess, but I had my first "ugly" game of the season last night. Tempers flared, had an assistant coach challenge me and fans yelling the entire game. Started off in the bottom of the first inning, we spotted them two runs in the top of the first and my cleanup hitter had just cleared the bases with a double to take the lead at 3-2. He decided to steal third (I didn't want him to steal, catcher had a cannon) and of course the throw beat him there by a mile. Well, instead of sliding or just giving himself up, he trucked the third baseman. I'm talking Pete Rose/Ray Fosse trucking. That's an automatic ejection in our league (14U) and I told my player immediately that he was ejected. Their coach came unglued, he ran across the field, screaming at the player, screaming at me, screaming at our fans, calling us classless.

My runner said "Coach, I don't know what I was thinking." He's a good kid, and he genuinely felt bad about it. He tried to apologize to the player (player called him a dumbass) and he went apologize to the umpire. He sat the rest of the game in the dugout with his mouth shut. We had to take an out every time he came up (more on that later). We went on to add two more runs in that inning to take a 5-2 lead. Their coach is still fuming, saying my kid was intentionally trying to hurt their kid. He's still arguing every ball and strike called by the umpire.

They get a run back in the top of the second and we respond with four in the bottom of the second to take a 9-3 lead. We had runners at second and third with two outs with our No. 3 hitter up (cleanup that was ejected spot was on deck). After a couple of pitches (one ball, one strike) to our No. 3 hitter, the coach realizes that the next batter is an automatic out, so he calls time and says he wants to walk our No. 3 hitter, which is smart. I would have done the same. Anyway, as the two umpires are talking to determine whether the pitcher has to actually throw four balls or just issue the free pass, their catcher starts mouthing off to our hitter. Next thing I know, they're nose-to-nose (catcher took off his mask) and bowing up on each other. I ran in there, separated them and both got warnings that if they did something like that again, they're both ejected. For the record, the second base umpire was watching the whole thing and confirmed with both coaches and head umpire that the catcher started the whole thing.

Anyway, we move into the third inning, go three up three down in their half and we add five more runs to take a 14-3 lead into the fourth, which will be the last inning because of both time limit and 10-run rule. Before the game, I had promised one of our "graduating" players that if we were in a comfortable position, I would let him pitch. He's not going to play baseball ever again, he's a friggin' science nerd enrolled in an IB program next year. He's going out of town next week and this was going to be his last game with us for the season, and most likely his last game of his baseball career. He's not a pitcher, well he's not much of a baseball player either, but I promised him I would let him pitch. I let my starter go out there and get the first out and then I called time to let the other kid come in to pitch the last two outs. In hindsight, I probably should have just went with the other kid to start the inning, but I owed it to my starter to let him get his pitches too, he had pitched well.

So, as I'm walking off the field, the third base coach says under his breath "That's bullshit." So I stopped and said "Hey coach, I'm not trying to show you guys up or anything." And I explain to him that the kid is playing his last baseball game of his career and I wanted to give him a chance to experience a nice moment. His response was "I don't give a shit about him. Look at the score, you idiot." And, not thinking, I said "Yeah, that's why I'm letting him pitch." And he says "Yeah, I see how you guys do things over here, no class at all." Well, I'm certainly not one to back down so I shot back "Right, you see how we do things here, we beat you 14-3 at our place and 12-3 at your place, we settle it on the field." And then he starts in about the umpires being on our side, how they're not getting any calls, how we're cheating, trying to intentionally take out players, etc. I said "Coach, it's 14-3, I don't think umpires' calls make that big of a difference in a 14-3 game." We go back and forth and my wife says "Stop talking!" and he shoots back "You shut the fuck up!"

I said "Hey man, that's not cool, that's my wife you're yelling at." He says "I don't give a shit." At that point, my assistant coaches could see my blood pressure boiling and one of them grabbed me and walked me down the left field line to cool off. In the meantime, the second base umpire walked over and ejected the coach for cursing. Of course he had a nice expletive-laced tirade as he's walking back to the dugout. We get the final two outs (not until our pitcher walked the bases loaded though) and thankfully the game ends. We line up to shake hands, and the other team just turns their back and walks off the field.

So I get my team up and start talking to them and I see their head coach coming across field. I'm thinking he wants to squash this, but instead he starts yelling at me about how unprofessional we were and then directs his attention to the umpires. I turned around and went back to my team, using that moment to teach them a life lesson about being the bigger man. He continued to scream at the umpires about how terrible they were and how this was the worst display of sportsmanship he's ever seen.

I was still shaking a good 10 minutes after everyone had left the field. It took everything in my power to not go ape shit on him when he yelled at my wife.

I hate that everything got so ugly, and I regret saying some of the things I said. I should have just shut up and walked away, but I let my anger take over. I'm just glad nothing came to blows or anything. And I'm glad our kids responded by hitting the ball and taking care of it on the field.

Now, we are supposed to play them again next Thursday (they're in our league, but not one of our regular teams) and I'm worried about any kind of lingering animosity. The first time we played them back in March, we beat them 12-3 and our coach accused our quietest player of talking trash the entire game. In talking to other coaches in our league, they all have had similar experiences with that team. Not to the level of animosity we had last night, but a lot of cockiness and accusations of cheating/trash talking.

Anyway, sorry for the long post. And thanks for reading and any input on what I could have done differently.

 

Should have punched the fucker in the throat. That would have shut him up.

 

That was my very first thought. And probably would have escalated had my assistant coach not grabbed my arm and started walking me down the line. I also looked up at my son, who was right there at third base and he was telling me "it's not worth it." He also thanked me after the game for not losing my cool and for not acting like the other coaches.

 

Jeez Louise. In my long and storied coaching career, I think the nastiest thing I've ever said to an opposing coach is, "sit down and be quiet."

I got a few technicals back in my early wild ass basketball coaching days, usually for "call the damn foul" or "what the hell" or something equally vile.

(One thing, since day one when I've ever been coaching kids sports, I've never ever used the F-word. Not once.)

I know in the various leagues I've coached in, they've had periods in which some coaches pretty frequently went apeshit, and as a result they mostly have pretty draconian coach-conduct rules now. One technical and you're gone.

In most of them now, you get chucked from one game, you're suspended for the next too. The second time, you're "suspended indefinitely pending appeal for possible reinstatement," with the presumption you probably won't be back.

Baseball-softball, I've never gotten much into bitching with the umps. Maybe, "hey, that looked like a strike to me" once in a while, but that's about it.

As far as fights with opposing teams/coaches, settle it on the field.

 

The red team coach has an unkind history that I could make a very big deal of if I wanted to. How he's even allowed to coach in the league is beyond me.

 

I've only recently gotten back into the coaching thing, but even when I was a brash little punk I didn't have anything like I had last night, Starman.

Like you said, the most I've ever gotten was a "Be quiet." I usually go out of my way to joke around with the opposing coaches/players. I don't take it that seriously. Do I want to win? Who doesn't? But I'm not getting paid, so my focus is on the kids having a good time.

This coaching staff has been the only one in our 18 games that we have had ANY kind of issue with. Even games that were hotly contested where the other team may have gotten screwed on a call, the coaches were able to laugh about it after the game. This guy swore he was getting cheated from the first inning and never let go of that thought, not even when we were going station-to-station to avoid running it up too much.

 

You handled this incorrectly. There is the pitching change that should have happened at the start of the inning, true.

But you never should have engaged in any dialogue. Every response should have been, "Scoreboard."

Also, I bet your player RAW scores went up, except for the guy who got ejected.

 

I suggest you try speak to their coaches before the next game. If they won't or it doesn't go well, don't play it. Not worth the hassle.

Also, don't bring the kid who got throw out or don't let him play.

 

Sounds like the kid who started the whole thing by bulldozing the 3B knows he screwed up. Have him apologize to the other kid and the opposing coach before the game. That should do it.

 

Stagger, I would strongly suggest letting the league bosses know what's up and asking the president/director or whatever to attend the game. They can talk to the umpires and then have more authority (and less emotion) to keep things cool throughout.