My appendix

Is gone.

I woke up Friday morning around 2 a.m. with awful stomach pain, and I though maybe I was just stopped up, but that wasn't the case.

We had to take a car into the shop Friday morning, so I drove it while the wife followed in the other car. I dropped her at work and oldest daughter at school, went home and died on the couch. Because I've had two ulcers in the last two years, the wife strongly suggested I call my doctor to get an appointment. I held out for a while but finally called and got an appointment for 2:30, called my Mom to take me and away we went.

The doctor poked and prodded on my stomach, making me wince and groan. Go to the emergency room, he said, and get a scan. Four hours after arriving at the ER, I got scanned and found my appendix was about 12 cm and fully enflamed, acute appendicitis.

Generally a 5 to 7 on the pain scale, one 10-second attack cranked that to 11. Because my blood pressure and pulse rate are generally low, they wouldn't give me morphine (shit) for the pain. I was afraid they were going to try antibiotics, but thankfully they decided to pull that fucker out. Finally, about 8 p.m., I was knocked out and went into surgery, woke up in recovery and moved to my private room. I was kind of in and out, my wife and in-laws showing up, with the wife staying until midnight (after about 6 p.m. that day, I lost all track of time).

I got some sleep that night, but it's hard to get comfortable with tubes and shit sticking out of you everywhere and a flare of pain every time I coughed (did I mention I also came down with a sinus infection earlier in the week? Not a good combination.).

Saturday they gave me two oxycodone, some antibiotics and finally release me around 2 p.m., 36 hours after it all started. I got a script for 60 (sixty!) oxy pills, which seems like an awful lot, and some stool softeners for that narcotic induced constipation relief.

With my earlier ulcer, wife's surgery and youngest daughter surgery, we long since passed our insurance deductible, so this thing should cost us no more than a couple hundred bucks.

I can't imagine the pain that would have come if the damn thing had burst, but I'm glad to have the we have no idea what its function is organ out of my body once and for all.

Plus, drugs.

 

Wow ... glad you're on the mend!

 

Had mine out in JAN 1996. Far easier than a hernia repair in May 1995.

I was bounding out and about the house within 48 hours. I then I did something bad which was probably reason #100 for my divorce at that point.

Get well soon. They didn't let me keep mine in a jar.

 

Get well soon, swing.

Along with worn out underwear and t-shirts, I left mine in Afghanistan in 2012.

 

Glad you're OK Swing.

 

Glad you're okay but holy fuck 60 Oxy?

I had mine out when I was 16 and it had swollen up so bad that they had to make a larger than normal cut. I got a handful of T3 for the pain.

My daughter had her gall bladder out via scope a few years ago and they gave her a dozen Oxy.

Can't believe how often they hand that shit out.

 

When your appendix bursts you no longer feel pain. That's when you need to worry because that means peritonitis, which also means your whole abdomen can be infected. That's why that sucker needs to come out.

Look on the bright side: with modern surgery you can still wear a bikini!

 

Hey, you can pay that off and still have 40 pills left!

 

Get well soon!

My "appendicitis" story: Nine years ago (was only about six weeks after taking a buyout from my longtime employer), I began experiencing stabbing abdominal pain. Waited two days, hoping it would go away, but it didn't. Finally, on a Sunday afternoon, told my wife she'd better take me to the ER -- but like a true NFL fan, I said we'd wait until the 1 p.m. game ended.

The ER staff suspected appendicitis and did a CAT scan -- revealing a ruptured lower intestine caused by one-in-a-million virulent case of diverticulitis and accompanying infection. Had I waited another day or two, it could have been fatal. As it was, I needed emergency surgery, followed by a week in the hospital with no solid food until the infection was gone. Had to wear a colostomy bag for two months, and then there was a second surgery to reverse the process.

Been fine since then. And a "fringe benefit" was that they removed the appendix during the emergency surgery, removing any chance of that ever being an issue.

 

Speaking of hernias ... had one repaired when I was in my early 20s. Wasn't that big of a deal, except you weren't supposed to drive for three weeks afterwards (I waited two weeks). About six weeks after the surgery, I was on the phone with someone and said, "Hang on a second, I have to sneeze." Moments later, I said, "I GOTTA CALL YOU BACK, I THINK MY GUTS JUST EXPLODED!"

Apparently I hadn't sneezed since before the surgery.

 

You pussies.

 

Had they cleared that 'fringe benefit' with you ahead of time?
Or is surgery now like a geocache: Dr. Moe Howard was here 2-2-2017. Took appendix, left clamp.