Oh Lord.......

you giant pussy.

 

Well unlike someone on this board my dorm wasn't stocked with a surgical theater nor would I have trusted my roommate with my feet.

 

Just yank it all out. Toenails are overrated. Once it's gone the skin underneath will harden in a hurry.

 

Ever cut a V-notch in the top middle of the nail and let the two sides grow toward the middle?

 

Don't trim your toenails so closely from now on. Cut them straight across and let the corners grow past the edge of your toe. Then they won't "grow in" and become a problem.

 

Maybe I should have just taken a butcher knife and performed my own appendectomy. What's the worse that could happen?

 

Surgery may be too strong a word for what I had. It was done at the podiatrist with a local. No big deal.

 

Nyet.
I can't even bring myself to say the s word.

 

How can your wife stand to see you with your socks off by now? Yeesh.

 

Its a mystery.

 

I saw this thread title and legitimately thought it was going to be about Phil Collins.

 

I used to think that until I got my two bionic hips.

Can't say enough about how good they were, and how smoothly it went. Both times.