Running 2017 MLB regular season thread

You should have followed up with this, rather than ...

Because if I'm going to whack off to an obscure National, it's for sure going to be Nyjer Morgan.

 

Can we start a petition to ensure that none of us have to read anything we don't want to?

 

Pretty sure Justin exclusively jacks off to Harper now.

 

And in other Twins news, some guy is gonna pitch again Monday, maybe for the last time?

New Twin Bartolo Colon ponders retirement after rough 2017

 

Who doesn't?

 

Rendon is probably my No. 1 seed. .... maybe Zimmerman with a little bit of Murphy.

 

Well, yeah, God, if he ever fucking actually played.

 

The Moncada game was pretty cool to watch last night. He got a lengthy standing ovation when he batted. Walk-up crowd of 5,000 on a Wednesday night. The whole at-bat looked like it was electric at the Cell, especially when he battled back from 0-2 for a walk.

He hit a couple absolutely on the screws during the course of the night, but one hooked foul and one landed harmlessly in the center fielder's glove.

 

And sometimes I wonder why I hang around here ...

 

When you make up fake Twitter and Facebook and Linkedin accounts to harrass me online, I'll still not care.

 

Didn't do that. Haven't done that. Wouldn't do that. That guess is as good as your crew's collective guess that Piotr Rasputin is @JohnHammond, which y'all were so proud of yourselves for (erroneously) thinking.

Give Doc and Double J all our best when you go deliver the daily "1.0" report in your little only-idiots-allowed circle jerk.

 

Did. Have. Would. Since you are a passive-aggressive putz and all.