Fact, not Opinion: Mayonnaise is the Queen of Condiments

Missed that in your bracket. Someone mentioned BBQ aioli too, but the lack of recognition for something that goes well with so many things was disappointing. A good barbecue sauce is essential in my kitchen.

 

I say let the mayonaissers have their moment.

In America, every day is BBQ sauce day.

 

Holy and shit.
I just got a little queezy there.

 

I can't remember which comedian said it on Shatner's roast, but Lisa Lampanelli had been with so many black men, that's what they called her vagina. "Roscoe's House of Chicken and Waffles."

 

Good cocktail sauce includes ketchup, horseradish, worcestershire, lemon juice and a dash or three of hot sauce. And it's better after it's had a few oysters dredged through it (LOL).

 

Oysters and mayo... snot and pus... what a great combo

 

For the Mayo fetish-types here ...

 

Which mayo sells under one name east of the Rockies and another west of the Rockies? Maybe it's a north/south thing.

 

I've told the story about the time I worked at the Pleasure Palace in Iowa City, midnight shift, and a fella comes in with a bag from McDonald's ... inside is a single hamburger plain ... and several packets of jelly. Told him thanks but not thanks.

Years later, circa 2005, Upper Valley of Vermont/New Hampshire, on the way home and stop at the store for dinner. This fella, who I chatted with weeks earlier -- hours before Jeter broke his 0 for 32 slump -- walks out of the store with a small paper bag. We're about to cross paths in the parking lot. He stops me to say hi and shows me the contents of the brown paper bag and asks if I want to go hang out. Inside the bag was a jar of mayo. Told him thanks but no thanks.

 

Hellmann's is called Best Foods on the West Coast.

Duke's is ubiquitous down South. Harder to find in the North.

 

Before reading, was gonna ask how you got a pic of Marge Schott with a Yankees hat?

 

Your premise is so wrong that it is shocking and might indicate some form of mental defect.
You and Jackson Browne should go slather each other up with some home-made mayo.