Things that irk you......

The way he said it seemed so cold and matter of fact. I'm sure he had seen it hundreds of times, but this time there was a distraught woman and five kids between the ages of 10 and 15 in the room.

He may as well have blown a bubble as he was saying it.

It's been 41 years and I can still see that entire morning.

 

People who stand too closely outside doors so that they get in your way when you are leaving a room.

 

I’m a reporter, I have dozens of pens and access to dozens more. I’m irked that I get so irked when I lose one

 

There's one pisser at a tap room and some dude is dropping a deuce

 

Did he have a coffee-flavored beer?

 

I didn't stick around to ask. I ducked into the ladies room (it's the Bay Area; we're cool like that)

 

Irk Hall of Fame: a "Humans of New York" tale of the bizarre ...



“A few years ago I get a call from my wife, and she tells me that her aunt is going through a tough time and needs a place to stay. So I agreed to let the aunt stay with us for a few months. ‘I’m doing a good deed,’ I thought. But things got weird after she moved in. She was a really quiet lady. And she always seemed to be watching me. I’d be walking around downstairs, and I’d notice the aunt peering down on me from the upper level. Like I was some sort of intruder. But I think to myself: ‘Just ignore it. She’s going through a rough time.’ Then one night I wake up at 2:30 AM and the aunt is standing over my bed, saying some sort of prayer over me. And I sleep completely naked. And I have no idea how long this woman has been there. And I wake up my wife, who starts dragging the aunt out of the room, and the whole time the woman is screaming at me: ‘I know who you are! You aren’t fooling anyone!’ It was terrifying. My wife and I separated four months later. Things hadn’t been going great, but that aunt definitely flushed the toilet.”

 

When you sit in the far back corner of a large Starbucks to write an article and two people sit near you and talk incessantly and loudly.

 

This is on my major irk list today: Tokyo medical school admits changing results to exclude women

 

I actually had someone do that to me on my mission. Not only did we give him our address, we said we'd cook dinner for him. It was one of those days.

 

And how did he respond to the testimony?

 

Have the Jehovah's Witnesses come over and make dinner.
Then insist everyone says the pledge of allegiance.
They leave, and you invite some friends over to enjoy the meal left behind.