Take care of yourself

I used my 50th b-day last month as the impetus to try to get back into a semblance of shape. I wasn't totally out of shape, but I had really started a pronounced decline from where I was even just a few years ago. Add to it, head case problems (mostly intense anxiety and panic attacks that come and go -- I went for an annual physical recently and the doctor was alarmed because I hadn't been sleeping and I looked like hell and my blood pressure was elevated, but it came way back down on a follow up visit 5 days later), and intense cardiovascular exercise used to be a really good regulator for me. I just lost my way a bit.

It's only been a few weeks, but I have been running (more like jogging compared to what I used to be able to do) at least 6 days a week, splitting it between outdoors and a treadmill. I have been going anywhere from 3 1/4 miles to 5 miles, depending on the day and how the legs feel. I hadn't gotten obese, but I did weigh 168 at the doc's office, which is heavier than I should be with my frame. Some of the extra weight is already starting to melt off of me. The doctor even said this. ... if you have exercised in the past, the body remembers and takes to it again pretty quickly. Which I am finding to be true. It is also helping to regulate my mind -- endorphin highs have always been a good thing for me. Because of my work, I need to run early in the morning, like Rocky time. I then shower and do a guided meditation for a half hour. Then I am ready for work. I am not all there yet, but physically (and a bit mentally), I am already starting to feel a bit better.

I think the hardest thing is going to have to accept that I am 50 and I won't be able to run at the pace I once was able to, even when I get my wind totally back. But my goals are pretty simple: 1) Be the best I can be at this age, 2) just feel better -- physically and mentally.

When my conditioning gets a bit better -- I am guessing a few more weeks, but maybe it will take a bit longer -- I am going to add the rowing machine in, which was something I used to enjoy. I'd run 3 1/2 miles on a treadmill and then go right to a rowing machine and try to set a personal best for a half hour row. We'll see if I can keep it up and follow that routine. But for right now, it's just running to ease my way back.

One goal I have, and this won't make sense to anyone but me: I want to buy a tailored velvet jacket. Ron Duguay wears one (he's still in phenomenal-looking shape for a guy in his 60s) sometimes during the NY Rangers pregame shows, and even though he's a more handsome man than I am, I decided I wanted one. But I won't get one until I have the body for it. At this pace, maybe fairly soon. Then I have no idea where or when I will ever wear it, because it's not really me, but I have been telling people I am going to wear it everywhere -- if I can wear it in the shower I will.

 

I am not much of a runner anymore. I have been doing about 3.5 to 5 miles, depending on the day, but at a snails pace compared to the way I used to run. But I am wearing a pair of Brooks right now. I don't think they make them anymore. They were Brooks PureConnect. I liked the shoes, so I bought a bunch of them and have been going through them. Not sure what I am going to do when I run out of them. They are a pretty minimalist pair of shoes.