When's the Last Time You Were in an Actual Fight?

How old is this jackass? That's a passive aggressive, cunty move throwing a forearm like that.

 

49; yeah I know. He’s one of those guys who lacks finesse so thinks he should be able to run right over me as I cower while instead I just square up and hold my position.

 

I’m 6-0 and have always been over 175 pounds as an adult. Only two fights were in middle school.

One thing I learned as an adult is if you are big, tall and look semi-athletic, no one is starting shit with you unless you start it first.

I had a buddy who was 5-5, and he couldn’t walk 20 feet in a bar without getting elbowed.

 

1996 or '97. Bar. I'll never hear "Wolly Bully" or "16 Tons" without thinking of that night. Still have the remnants of a scar on my right index finger.

I got into a shit-ton of fights as a kid. Won some, lost some but was never seriously hurt outside of a black eye.

 

I admire and applaud your restraint, but your trash talk game leaves a lot to be desired.

 

An almost-fight story. I'm 50. About six months ago I was leaving a rock concert (small venue, all standing) a little early and as I was going past him a guy gave me an elbow shove. I nearly fell but didn't. I went back and got in the guy's face and yelled "What the fuck was that?" He said "you ruined the show." I did this by standing in front of him. I am 6'4, about 205 pounds. This guy was maybe 5'10 but brawnier and I would guess he was about half my age. Most people, just looking, would have picked him to win the fight.

Despite adrenaline surging, I yelled back, "You could have moved. Or said something to me. There's a better way to deal with this."

To which he replied, "Fuck you."

At that point I left, not seeing much opportunity for productive dialogue. His response also left me thinking I could have won the fight, because he seemed to lack the ability to think lucidly under stress.

In reviewing this ten-second conflict, I was kind of pleased with how level-headed my remarks were.

 

I would have waited for him in the parking lot, followed him home and stuck a banana in his tailpipe

 

Age 18-19 maybe? I was at this massive party and a handful people started brawling, no idea why. I got caught in the crossfire. Someone caught me from behind with a sucker punch on the side of the head. I spun around, blinded by rage, and swung without knowing who I was aiming at. Hit some random guy in the face, and he fell down pretty quickly. I then ran behind a car and watched the rest of it with a buddy and a fresh Miller Lite.

 

Exactly. I couldn’t beat a bag of marshmallows, but I’m 6-2. Whenever I’ve stood my ground, the situation has magically come to a nonviolent resolution. I’m willing to get my butt whupped on principle (no way I’m winning), but luckily haven’t had to.

 

Y'all are tough but are ya tough for Jesus?

 

At this point in my life, I’d rather buy a dude a beer than fight. I don’t go out much anymore, and if I do it’s at an adult bar, so the chances of a fight are low. It’s the college kids who get drunk and want to prove how tough they are.

 

Yesterday. I won.