Most questionable reason you ever broke up with you someone

I once had a girlfriend break up with me on a Wednesday night.
On Thursday morning we left for my sister's wedding in Nebraska, a roughly 16-hour drive away. In her car. Which was stick shift, which I couldn't drive.
You can fit a lot of "What's wrong? Nothing." conversations into 16 hours, and she never did tell me why she suddenly hated me. I think the closest hint I got was around Kansas City, when I was navigating and said something like, "And just keep right up here to get on 35 North" as we came up on a sign indicating such, to which she snapped, "You think I'm stupid, don't you!?"
On the ride home on Sunday I can't even remember stopping for food or gas, although we obviously did at some point. She drove it straight through like a damn methed-up Terminator.
THAT was an uncomfortable trip.

 

I like — like, a lot — Mark Twain.

 

If I was you then, I’m going Greyhound, not worth it. She broke up with you already, you’re not getting lucky that trip.

 

This was not the reason that we broke up, but a girl that I dated for about 2 months repeatedly said “Homey don’t play that” to express disapproval. This was years after In Living Color went off the air. If I were head over heels in love with her, it probably still would have been a deal breaker

 

Not the reason for the breakup, but I could tell it wasn’t going anywhere when she couldn’t figure out then/than.

Also, for the love of god, people who go the PDA route after two beers on a first date...

 

@wicked ...Yep.

Same here. For someone who often put forth an almost jaundiced view of humanity, Twain could reaffirm almost anyone's faith in ideas we've gotten a little too adept at being cynical about. Marriage and the pot and lid ideal come up, especially when you know that "The Diary of Adam and Eve" was written as a tribute to his own dear Livy.

“Wheresoever she was, there was Eden.”

For Mark Twain, It Was Love At First Sight | History | Smithsonian

Okay, back to unreasonable breakups:

#something.) He was a little too fond of UT. With one exception. Talk about the Body Farm, and he would act like I'd just bitten the head off a live chicken.

#whatever comes after something.) I wouldn't get rid of my Dixie Chicks CDs.

 

Good plan, except that we had been dating for about six months at that point, more or less living together, and I thought at the time it might end in marriage. It was also my first real relationship, so I thought maybe it was just a fight or a bad day and it would blow over.
She also didn't tell me why things turned on a dime. Not once.
I came home that Wednesday night around 8 p.m. and she was in bed and all the lights in the apartment were out. It was weird, but we had to get up early the next day and I thought maybe she just got in bed early. Then came the road trip from hell, followed by a couple of weeks of the extended cut since we were more or less living together, and another 2 1/2 years of psychological torment as she randomly popped in and out of my life right as I was starting to get over her.
In three years of that process, she apologized a couple of times but never once offered an explanation.
So, naturally, in the initial blow up there was no time to make alternate plans and still some hope that it was a minor wrinkle that could be ironed out.

 

Sorry misunderstood your breakup.

 

S'cool. I didn't really explain the full story behind it.

 

Granted, both parties are older here, but went on a terrific first date last night with a woman who is largely gray at this point. Maybe it just goes well with a dark Sicilian complexion, but what I found attractive was that she felt secure enough not to feel compelled to dye it. (Maybe that's why she gave me a chance.) Previous girlfriend, about five years younger, dived into the dye when a gray hair dared show up...the kind of tic which manifests itself in more important issues.

 

I’ve had a receding hairline since my early 20s. A barber helpfully informed me during those years, “you won’t have this much longer.” Thanks man.

I was dating a girl around then who said if someone didn’t do anything about going bald, they didn’t care about their physical appearance. It was along the same lines as if you were overweight, etc., she said.

Years later I discovered she was married to a bald guy and that she’d gained 80 pounds. This was before she’d had the kid.

 

Karma’s a bitch....