Just... stressed

Apologies up front for this post, but I'm just a big fucking ball of stress and emotion right now and need an outlet.

Certainly, 13 days before the election, I'm a wreck. A wreck.

But also, these two weeks our daughter has been submitting her college prescreen auditions for schools all over the country. She's been a Theatre Kid since she was 8, and this is all she's ever wanted to do. Her resume is strong, her academics are immense (35 on the ACT, out of 36), and she did the best she could on the prescreen videos.

It's so, so subjective, and there's no way to know how competitive she really is until you actually get into the process, and that is exactly what we have just started. Essentially, she needs to make this cut, then another live audition cut to be accepted, and it's ridiculously competitive.

She's my kid, she's such a joy and she works her ass off. And now it's out of our hands.

I don't know that I can take it. I can only imagine how she feels.

 

Plus, she's a theater kid. A career based on subjective opinions. I've heard seasoned character actors, people with scores of TV and movie credits say the feeling of dread ahead of auditions (we're talking for one-shot guest star roles on a TV series) never goes away - but it is the "cost" of doing what you love.

 

My coping mechanism for 50+ yrs; only worry about what you can control.

 

So, is this to get into some special school, like Juilliard, or something?

Because I didn't know theater majors had to submit resumes and auditions to get into their majors at colleges.

And, just so you know, you're not alone in stressing out right now, even if we all may have different reasons for doing so. I'm in the same boat, and have been for the past month or so -- part of why I haven't spent as much time on here lately, too. Sometimes, just knowing you're not alone is helpful. Sometimes, it's not, of course. But sometimes, it is.

 

College is a weird deal, when you think about how it impacts your life trajectory - who your friends might be, where you may end up living, a future spouse etc. It must be a lot like what players deal with ahead of the draft - but I guess the money helps ease the anxiety.

 

Replying not as a parent but as someone who has been where your kid is ... auditioning sucks and it will continue to suck throughout one's lifetime in my experience. However, I'm also a great believer in fate and that through this process your daughter will end up where she is meant to be. And if she truly wants to pursue a performing career, this is the easy part.

Hang in there, let her put her best foot forward and just be supportive whatever the outcome. I didn't have family support for my choice to pursue a performing career and was always envious of those who did. It means a lot.

 

True. I wasn't the best student in school (C+/B-), but I was in a high-achievement class in school, had very good SATs, a solid essay and teacher recommendations. I ended up getting accepted to just two out of the seven schools I applied for. My Mom and I visited the first school during a regular weekday when it was gray and cloudy, and it seemed ordinary. We visited the second school during a "Welcome Accepted Students!" weekend, where it was bright and sunny (a couple of weeks after the first school visit), and just seemed to be a happier place.

And I ended up meeting my future wife there. We occasionally talk about how our lives would be totally different if I'd decided to go to the other college.

As for UNCGrad, hang in there. I'm sure your daughter will do great, no matter what happens.

 

Depends on the school. Some of them are competitive just to get in the door while others are easy to get in, but you have to audition or present a portfolio to stay in the BFA track. So much of it is so very subjective. If she doesn't get in one place, she'll go where she was meant to be. God, door, window, and all that.

Break a leg, UNCGradlette! <3

 

It's also a good time to have a talk about life and not always getting what you want, making the best of situation you didn't choose etc. There were any number of situations in my life where I wonder where I'd be if a different choice was made - by me or someone else. I've always liked the idea that a "No" isn't a "No" but really a "Not Yet."
Of course, I graduated college at 30.

 

The thing I have to say that doesn't come as supportive is that the audition and all the crap surrounding it never goes away. No different than people who major in music. Always battles for seats and solos and such ... nothing makes it go away unless the person involved goes into something else.

What your daughter is going into is as subjective as music, figure skating, gymnastics, etc. I dearly wish I could offer something more assuring, but I cannot. We are all here for you and your family. If she is as smart and prepares, just be there for her.

Take care. Break a leg.