The best headline ever

How’d you get sick, Timmy?

Turtle bit me.

 

Last year the TPC golf tournament only got about one half of one round finished over the first two days because of rain and had to go to the dreaded Monday finish. So I let The Carpenters write the head for me after Friday's washout: "Rainy Days and Monday"

I worked with a headline guru in Fort Lauderdale many years ago, a grumpy sort who looked like Ted Kaczynski but came up with some gems.

On a column about the impact of sports betting (this was back in the early 1990s):
"Lines on the Tigers and Bears, oh my!"

On Nicklaus' 1986 Masters victory:
"Add a 'Gee' to 'Olden Bear"

 

Talk about a reach. We got talked to for this one.
Venice is in Italy (also in California, next to L.A.). Italians are mobsters.

Headline from baseball game:
(Player)
is hit man
for Venice

The player got the only hit in the game for Venice. It drove in a run. They won, 1-0.

 

Clever headline, Sonny ...

 

He wanted to Cher it with everyone.

 

As far as I'm concerned, this is the headline of all headlines:

 

Holy shit.

 

Those are horrible head specs

Based on the lead, "Get-er-done Girl" is the least suckiest I could probably do.

 

She's legal to drink in 2023. Bob's your uncle.

 

We used to go 1-48-3 light on the rail and that changed to 1-48-4 as 4-deck heds became acceptable. No idea how we did it but we did.

 

Four- (and five-) deck heads became acceptable when column widths shrunk by more than 25%, from 12.33 picas to 9.

It wasn't so much a change in philosophy as a collective "Fuck this, I can't say anything in this spec" acknowledgement.