Chef gets a colonoscopy

Bunch of golfing buddies were razzing me Sunday about it.
They asked how it went…..I told em that as long as I didn’t wake up and having the Dr wink at me while he was burning a heater, it was all gravy.
Speaking of which…….that Thursday afternoon poopa-palooza…….

 

I had mine about 7 yrs ago, you folks had it easy. Then, you stopped eating 24 hrs before and all you got was jello. Oh and you had to drink what looked like 10 gallons of water/solution before 24 hrs was up, every last drop. Man you crapped the hell our of yourself. Procedure was nothing. But man I felt like all pipes were cleaned afterwards.

 

We drank it all for the dookies.

 

Had 2 because of family history. The first one was the "bad" prep, the latest one was a breeze - no gagging, at least.

For the last one, I woke up for about the last 5 minutes of it. Opened my eyes and found myself watching the inside of my colon on a big video screen. I told the doctor I was back awake and asked if that was OK. He answered with the most dismissive scoff I've ever heard, and said, "You're fine." Felt him cut out a couple of polyps, which wasn't ideal. Thanks for the reminder, I'm due for another one this fall ...

 

Sounds like lots of us have photos.

I hope this thread doesn’t turn into Show and Tell.

 

That’s just to find the person’s head.

 

What's the process now? I thought you still had to fast for 24 hours and spend 12 hours near a toilet.

 

I went the Cologuard route and laughed, thinking at any other time, if I shit in a box and mailed it someone, I'd be in trouble.
I've had two endoscopies, and the anesthesia the use is light flipping a light switch. They hit you with it, and you're out. They turn it off, and you are back awake.
The upper GI I did sucked because that stuff you had to drink/swallow was like mud.

 

I had one about six weeks ago. No eating for 24 hours before and I had to drink the vile solution. Drinking that stuff is by far the worst part of the whole thing for me.

 

I've had 4, not because of any problems, but because I'm getting too damn old. First one, knocked out completely. Wasn't aware of anything until I woke up back in the room. Then I moved to a different city and have had 3 at the new place. All 3 have put me in la-la land. And I concur, the prep is worse than the actual procedure. Don't get between me and the porcelain throne.

 

Practically had to beg my wife to get one. She kept resisting, saying she didn't have any polyps. Finally went and had one and she had THREE polyps. Glad I saw this because I think she's overdue. I've had three myself. After the first one, I felt like I had to go No. 2 and I did. Except it was all blood from where he removed a big polyp. No problems since.