The Economy

Sounds like you saw some serious shit.

 

Might have mentioned this before but about nine months ago I was passed on a highway by a Driver's Ed. driver.
It was fine. Daydreaming along two or three miles under the speed limit in the right lane and a car clearly marked Student Driver smoothly passed me by.
Thought it was funny, actually.

 

Several years ago, my school needed someone to switch to driver's ed. "Nope." More than once, I've seen our teacher come in, plop down in a chair pale white and visibly shaking.
Double nope.

 

I'm a bit of a Left Lane Larry. For whatever reason the right lane of the stretch of interstate I frequent is kind of a rough ride, so I stick to the left lane as much as I can. But I also drive anywhere from 5 to 15 mph over the speed limit most of the time and will move over for someone who wants to go faster than that.

What pisses me off to no end, however, are the fucking idiots who refuse to read the traffic pattern. If I'm going about 80 in a 70 and there is a line of cars to the right that we're passing along at a decent clip, with no good place to squeeze in where I won't immediately cut myself off, just chill the hell out. We'll be past them soon enough and then I'll slide over when there's some open road. Don't tailgate me. I'm not going 90 and risking a ticket or a wreck just so you can get your rocks off. Especially when there is no speed I could go that's fast enough to get them off my bumper.

Or, alternately, maybe look up to see that the two trucks passing each other at 67 and 65 mph are the reason why there is a line of cars stacked up 15 deep behind them, in which we are Nos. 4 and 5. And then don't try to zip in and out of the two lines by squeezing your SUV into a space that a Smart Car would have trouble fitting into. Those are the fuckers I enjoy anviling into the back of an 18-wheeler by speeding up an extra 2 mph. You will learn patience, young Jedi.

 

You live in the DMV, right?

What do you know about reaching speeds of over 15 miles per hour?

I’d never seen someone shave in a car until I went to D.C.

 

On the interstate, I drive in holes.
This isn't the white flag lap at Daytona. There is no reason for you to be right beside, in front, or behind me for an extended period of time. Sometimes, traffic gets jammed up, and it can't be helped. Otherwise, move on or fall behind. We aren't drafting. We aren't traveling in consort.
That shit's where accidents happen.

 

Try getting behind a log truck in the Ozarks.

 

Someone needs to tell that to drivers in Davidson, Sumner, and Dickson Counties. Since when does a turn signal mean, "Hurry up and beat them to the turn?"
My favorite was the twit who whipped out while I was backing out of a parking place. I nearly hit their car. The woman in the passenger seat rolled down her window and screamed, "We wuz faster!"

I thought everyone was joking until I drove to Dickson to do an interview this afternoon.

Depends. Feel jealous of the great definition in their legs. Go around if there's room or hang back and wait for the chance to go around.

Are you there, Maya Angelou? It's me, Oscar.

Hahahahahaha!

 

Pretty much my thinking when I get west of Mt. Juliet.

 

The most stress-free long drive I’ve ever had was when I was pulling a U-Haul trailer full of my oldest kid’s stuff from Florida to Texas. It was one of those trailers where the tires are speed-rated for like 62 mph. I just set the cruise at 61 for most of the way down I-10 and just stayed to the right and let everyone around me. It was really nice to not feel pressure to keep up with traffic.

 

The best regular long drive for me was Memphis to Nashville on Friday afternoons during the late 80s. I worked at the Opryland offices and that included answering the phone for the Acuff during the shows. It was the best time to turn on the tape recorder and compose whatever was a WIP. Night drives back early Sunday morning or late Sunday night had the weird feel of hurtling toward the edge of the world in a Nixon-era space capsule.

 

You'll get no denigration of the 2017 Ford Fiesta from me. I had one -- affectionately known as The Little Limo -- too, and I liked it a lot. But I gave it to one of my brothers a couple of years ago when he was down-and-out and needed a car, trading up, myself, for the top-tier 2021 Toyota Corolla XSE Hatchback that I'd had my eye on at the time.

But I made the change only because I could afford to do it, and also help my brother out, not because of any problems with The Little Limo, which I still like in that attached kind of way, way more than I do the Corolla. And now, my brother likes it, too.