Your best In-Laws story

My mother-in-law was obsessed with Mrs. W getting married and having kids so that she could brag to her friends. She placed personal ads on her behalf and called her an old maid (we met when she was 27). As soon as I proposed, she demanded to know when we were having kids to the point where I told her never to mention it again. We decided to wait a few years after we got married before having kids and she pestered Mrs W. and made repeated appointments for Mrs. W with fertility specialists. When she turned 57, she said she couldn’t really celebrate because she wouldn’t be able to go to a bar or bat mitzvah for her eldest grandchild until she was in her 70s.

Fast forward and we have our first (18 years ago last week!). The first week after my paternity leave ends, she comes up to Manhattan to spend Friday with Mrs. and newborn W. I get home around 6 and she turns to the 2 of us and says “just to be clear, I’m not going to be a professional grandmother” and for at least the next 10 years, doesn’t watch the kids without someone to help her.

 

I'm sorry, man, but started laughing after sentence two and all the way to the end. Think I'd enjoy a beer with you and Vombatus.

 

I've had two sets of in-laws and both were fine. My first wife is black and I'm a white, Jewish guy. The first time I was invited to her parent's house for dinner, her father, who grew up in Louisiana and learned to cook there, made extra spicy food. I could see him laugh each time I asked for another glass of water. That didn't scare me away and I grew to really like his cooking.

My second wife is 11 years younger than me, and her mother is only 12 years older. That freaked out her mom a bit and I don't know why. One time I was picking up my then girlfriend from her parents house for a date and they were eating dinner and I wasn't offered anything. It became a running joke at mealtime. "Can MTM eat, too?"

 

Congrats on making it through 18!! (And hopefully decades and decades more).

 

That reminds me of my buddy's quip about LA, "the only place where the moms are more attractive than the daughters." (This was way before we had MILF in the common lexicon)

 

Since I've posted about my mother in law, I'll give my father in law equal time...

My in-laws got divorced just shy of their 40th anniversary. My father in law was a former Lutheran minister. I think they were both in their 70s when they got the divorce.

He was very angry about the whole thing and blamed my MIL. He would only refer to it around my wife as "when your mother divorced me." He said he never wanted a divorce. He took his vows seriously and was broadsided by her insistence on a divorce.

She wanted the divorce because after 39+ years of marriage he told her that he was gay, had a 40-something boyfriend, and would she mind if the boyfriend moved into the room above the garage?

 

Moms have had more work done.

 

Thanks — crazy. Heading to college in a few weeks. And staying on theme, my mother in law is mad that my eldest, who after looking at 30 schools got in early decision at Carleton, isn’t going to a school that she’s heard of so she can’t brag to her mahjong group.

 

Oh, my. What a kicker.

 

Maybe I’m an asshole, but I never let my in-laws tell me Jack shit. And thus we got along just fine.

But with their daughter giving me the boot, the next time I see either of them will be at their funerals.

 

Good god, and here I thought
Nancy Walker had died years ago!

 

Not the case here.