RIP Matthew Perry

I went to Catholic school. This was before vouchers and the sorta public school revolt, so this was Catholic school in the traditional, neighborhood sense. Which meant this was not a rich school, it had a small staff, and it drew from a pretty tiny almost entirely working class geographical area, but the bonds there were incredibly tight.

I've always identified with the 1980s movie (about the 1960s) ... "Heaven Help Us". While our priests/nuns were not at all sadistic (except one German-born third grade teacher I had, but she was more school marm sadistic, not priest sadistic), this was the post-Vatican II 70s and 80s after all, the vibe of that movie really rings true. I wasn't in New York, but I was in an urban school with the same sensibilities and the same incredible naivete that being Catholic seems to create at that age.

That place was and always will be home to me, even though our family moved out of state for good less than a year after I graduated. High school? Made some life-long friends I cherish to this day, but it was a way station in hindsight.

Inky made a great point about social media kind of ruining reunions to a point. That almost certainly factored into my high school reunion and why it was cliquey.

 

Never been to one of my high school reunions (our 30th was in September) but I did go to one of my ex-wife’s. There was a woman there who had been an anonymous kid but went off to college and was now a scientist up in Huntsville, very likely the most accomplished member of the class. She wasn’t putting on airs or being ugly about it, but clearly she was hoping for some validation and acceptance that never came around in her teen years. I enjoyed talking to her, but I think we were the only couple who gave her the time of day. It was sad to see.

 

That is what I always picture happening at reunions rather than the Hollywood version. I'm sure a bit of both happen, but I imagine plenty of people hoping to find the validation they never got in high school leave their reunions very disappointed.

 

I always enjoyed that movie.

 

I went to two reunions as a plus-one and that’s an interesting perspective. The first was with a girlfriend. We got there a little late and ended up sitting with strangers but I think she had a good time.
A few years later went with my now ex-wife to her reunion out of state. It was a smaller school and she had a great time. I found another husband who knew sports and we chatted all night as the classmates did their thing. I was 11 years older than my wife and was disappointed that I was edged out as oldest spouse.

 

We went to my wife’s a few years ago and her high school was so large that half the people didn't know the other half even when they were in school. It seemed more like a mixer than a reunion.

 

This is a lovely tribute by Hank Azaria, whom Perry helped to get sober.

Opinion | Hank Azaria: To Matthew Perry, God Was a Bunch of Drunks in a Room

 

I went to my 41st reunion this past summer - no one was motivated enough to do a 40th - and it'll be the last one I attend. Most of the "cool" kids were at the bar doing shots, and after a group picture in the outdoor space at the venue, I hung out there with some other guys. Then they started reliving football games, and talking about specific plays and how they made a tackle or blah blah blah. I only went because a woman who lived one street over from where I grew up called and asked me, and she thanked me for coming to her mother's funeral during the phone call, so I felt obligated. But that's enough for me.

 

At the three HS reunions I've attended, each time the lame-o turds running the show made a point to have all the football players stand up so we could applaud them. Not the Honor Society, nor other brilliant students, nor any other team or group or club.

And most of the people cheered and applauded. I don't know why. Our football team was touted as a leading contender for the district title my senior year, but our valient heroes of the gridiron somehow fell short. Everyone agreed, then and now, that it was because of their 0-10 record.

I'll probably skip the next reunion. Or maybe I'll do the quiet stuff out loud:
"What's going on here? We doing this shit AGAIN? They went OH AND TEN!"

 

I was just gonna say I haven't had to worry about that at either of the two reunions we've had b/c our football team was like 2-8 or 1-9 when we were seniors and then I kept reading and ohmygoodness.

 

I was hoping it wasn’t something like this. Addiction is a motherfucker.