The Soccer Thread (Version 14.5) -- We Don't Need Another Euro

I don't know if it's Southgate or what, but England has spent most of the time in its three matches playing dismal static football, almost the negative stereotype of the sport held by some Americans.
PS: France ain't been much better.

 

One of the annoying AF things about the Euros (and the World Cup) expanding is that top two teams move on was remarkably simple to figure. I've been trying for five minutes to figure out England's situation for the Round of 16 and am stumped.

Here's what I know (and I'll edit as appropriate)

England will play a third-place team in Gelsenkirchen on Sunday.

That team will be the Netherlands unless ...

... Georgia beats Portugal AND Turkey gets any result better than losing by three goals to the Czechs
... The Czechs beat Turkey by more than three goals

At which point, England would play the third-place team in Group E, which literally could be any of the four teams (Ukraine-Belgium, Slovakia-Romania), but they know that the third place team will make it in.

 

Adding the four third-place teams means more kids get orange slices!

Slovenia had no intention of ever trying to do anything that might have won that game. Perfectly content to tie.

 

Try as we Yanks might, we'll never match the snark of an English footy fan. Here is an email one sent to the Guardian at the end of the match. "Football matches are sometimes described as chess matches. But that's usually because they are cerebral and tactical, not because only pieces moves at a time."

 

I am wondering if they are in a studio. I mean they are doing a game every day.
Someone with more knowledge of German geography than me can tell me - are they traveling every day?

 

Enough about USMNT ‘94.

 

I thought it was interesting when Darke mentioned it was only an hour by air from London to Cologne. Probably two hours in WWII, but the Allies bombed the hell out of that city and leveled it to the ground.

 

I believe he’s in Germany, at least some of the things he said, plus this Tweet suggest that.


If he was watching the feed I was, the stuff he missed were really obvious. For example, a Slovenian player got a yellow for a foul that the ref let continue on advantage. The ref clearly points the player is going to get a yellow. Then when there’s a stoppage, ref shows yellow and points to the spot. Darke and Donovan both think it’s someone else and chide the ref for not being clear.

Then on an English goal that was called offsides, you can see everyone’s reaction right away and the flag. Darke goes into the call well after it’s obvious it wasn’t a goal.

I just wonder if he couldn’t see from his spot or if he’s just off today.

 

The two farthest apart venues in the tournament are Hamburg and Munich, which are 777 km apart, or less than the distance from Kansas City to Dallas.

It's possible they could be in a relatively shitty broadcast location, as the American broadcaster probably is nowhere near first choice in these places. Also, I'm guessing Fox is probably cutting a lot of corners on the little things like spotters that would help out a lot here. On the other hand, Ian Darke is 70 and he very well could be losing his fastball, so to speak.

 

It's hard for me to bitch too much about things like production values when the print side suffers from the same problem but some of ESPN's live production work this playoffs was just awful. I mean, Barkov picks up the Stanley Cup and skates out of frame as he lifts it and they can't keep up. I'm guessing they laid off that extra camera man last year so they could clear McAfee's payroll. I felt bad about saying that, as a contemporary from college had a direct hand in some of their pre-roll footage, but it's noticeably bad live. The list of complaints about Fox stuff, particularly on soccer is a mile wide and goes back nearly 10 years (Gus Johnson, anyone?)

I've been in the business for 18 years and the single immutable truth is that you get what you pay for. Every single fucking time.

 

It felt like the camera was a mile away from the pitch.

I think we are remarkably spoiled by Premier League telecasts, we are generally first-rate, no matter the venue.