How does your family handle death?

That is an incredible story. I'm glad you had that experience, too.

 

One of my closest golfing buddies suddenly passed away in the night earlier this week. He was only 58, heartbreaking. Our mutual friend called me about 9:30 am and I’m thinking what’s the tee time and he tells me “Matt” is gone. I just broke down completely, like I was 10 and my dog died. It was rough. Even worse is I just saw him two months ago and was supposed to see him in a couple of weeks when I went to SD. The closest buddy I’ve lost ever. His wife is in a pincer move, she had just had the service for her mom the day before. Brutal.

I spoke to her last night and I felt bad breaking down on the phone and she broke down as well. She told me it was good for her because she needed to let down and stop “being strong” for a sec.

I’m chipping in my office and I’m hearing Matt in my head say something funny.

We’re going to rename the annual golf buddies trip the Matt Memorial and start a college fund for his two girls (12 & 16). Sorry if this is off topic. Thanks for letting me share.

 

So sorry for your loss, QT.

 

Since 2013, we have a golf tournament every year that honors the memory of the daughter of a friend. She died from cancer at age 24. She was a UDub grad who had done humanitarian work in Africa and South America. The tournament has gone from 3-4 guys to eight or nine foursomes. ALL of us graduated from the same high school between 1967 and 1975. Some of the guys have known each other since kindergarten. We are all between age 68 and 76 now. Including spouses and a few who just attend to reunite, it's a group of more than 50. We have been friends for more than 50 years.

The second year (2014), they decided to start a foundation and asked for donations, although no one was required to contribute. All go to the University of Washington Department of Education. The tally now is approaching $220,000 ... all from private donations. The foundation has reached endowment status so it replenishes each year after two or three grants of a few thousand dollars are awarded. The tournament is named for the deceased daughter. She also played volleyball and some money is donated to her club and high school programs.

A few years ago, one of our friends died. He was an excellent golfer who qualified for the U.S. Senior Open twice. He originally started our tournament with a ceremonial first drive. In the scramble format, the foursomes could use his drive or their own on the first hole. After he died, his best friend, also an excellent golfer, stepped in to replace him. After the ceremonial drive, the tourney host sprinkles some of the deceased's ashes in the fairway where the ball stopped. And another friend donated a crystal trophy in the name of the deceased. The winners' names are engraved on it each year.

 

Damn, Chris, that's so inspirational.

Talk about leaving a legacy. In the end, feels like that's the best thing that can be said about somebody.

 

Condolences. It's good you allow yourself to grieve. It's not all that easy, in my experience.

I have group of friends that sounds a lot like yours. We all go back many, many years. The top reason we all still see each other each year is because one of our group died in college. We did a charity golf event each year to raise money for a scholarship in his name, and we continue to carve out that same time each year to get together.

I hope your group can enjoy the same experience we have, and honor his memory through stories of the great times.

 

Things like this, so recent, so real, just hit the heart. Keep chipping toward the fun memories.

 

I’m so sorry. Peace to you and your family.

 

My condolences. May Matt’s memory be a blessing.

 

Holy shit that’s an egregious typo I can no longer edit. I am so, so sorry.

Grace and peace.

 

The functionality disappears after a couple of days. For most typos, I would laugh it off. That one, yeesh.