Dear dimwit on the phone

Evergreen tweet, I know.

 

I'd forgotten about that one. So true.
But the worst is the weird spellings. A woman called and said we misspelled her kid's name in the paper. The phone guy says, "We didn't, you did."

 

Dear grade chasing parent,

I know my class is hard. I did that on purpose. And just because your kid did really well in an AP class last year, doesn’t guarantee an A this year in College Prep. If you wanted an easy A, your son should have taken underwater basket weaving. I understand he’s had a B all semester. He started off doing B work.

By the way, instead of crying to me about why he doesn’t have an A and that my grading is too tough and that I’m not doing enough to raise his grade he has done the following:

• Asked me what he missed and how he can improve
• He has taken my advice and improved
• Comes in every day with a smile on his face ready to work
• Is the go-to person whenever anyone needs help
• Had worked his ass off

And that is why your kid is getting an A on his first semester report card. Have a great holiday.

Mr. Spartan

 

I work in a small enough market that sometimes I honestly just try to look up the correct spelling through social media. It's not a fool-proof method, but it helps.

Check. Re-check. Double-check again.

 

First you cost them scholarships as a sports writer, now you're doing it as a teacher. Damn, you're good.

 

Ar my last full-time gig, we had a rural school with 300-400 kids. One volleyball coach asked me "How do you know all these names?"
"It's (Podunk). The same girls play all the sports."