Stanley Cup Final Haiku Contest.....We have a winner! Mustardbased.........

Re: Stanley Cup Final Haiku Contest..... Win a $50.00 Amazon Gift Certificate

Since I'm an idiot who can't count to fucking seventeen fucking syllables, I'm not going to keep ruining this thread with my fucking failings.

Good luck to those who participate in this.

 

Re: Stanley Cup Final Haiku Contest..... Win a $50.00 Amazon Gift Certificate

As a disgruntled St. Louis Blues fan:

Hate the fucking Wings
Hope they all get some V.D.
And burn deep in hell

I'm a bitter man
Take hockey way too seriously
My team is so bad

No playoffs in years
At least three, no postseason
While the Wings win Cups

Stand by my haiku
Happily bitter, go Blues
Hate the fucking Wings!

 

Re: Stanley Cup Final Haiku Contest..... Win a $50.00 Amazon Gift Certificate

Never took you for a quitter, HB.

Live and learn, I guess.

 

Re: Stanley Cup Final Haiku Contest..... Win a $50.00 Amazon Gift Certificate

Penguins and Red Wings
Who the hell watches hockey?
The smart people, eh

Who are these bozos?
They play, but no one knows it
Fuck ESPN

One month of summer
No native teams in Finals
Sucks for Canada

Geddy Lee likes it
Neil Peart is also fan
Good enough for me

 

Re: Stanley Cup Final Haiku Contest..... Win a $50.00 Amazon Gift Certificate

Rush into hockey?
Signals was about baseball
Alex Lifeson weeps

(I know the rules, JR ... merely a response to Piotr ... not that my entries were gold in the first place ... )

 

Re: Stanley Cup Final Haiku Contest..... Win a $50.00 Amazon Gift Certificate

The Pocket Rocket
Holds the Cup over his head
All the world is well

(original six rules)

 

Re: Stanley Cup Final Haiku Contest..... Win a $50.00 Amazon Gift Certificate

I will watch hockey
if I also get free beer
so it's been three years

Red Wings are so old
AARP magazine
all over locker room

Steelers fans saying,
"We still have a hockey team?
More Iron City!"

 

Re: Stanley Cup Final Haiku Contest..... Win a $50.00 Amazon Gift Certificate

Thanks to Sid the Kid
The Penguins won't hoist the Cup
In Kansas City

Red Wings win the Cup
Detroit fans will burn city
Just like '84

Chelios is old
I watched him as a kid
Why's he still playing?

NHL ratings
Worse than Arena Football
Thanks, Gary Bettman!

Super Mario
One of the greatest ever
And a good owner.

 

Re: Stanley Cup Final Haiku Contest..... Win a $50.00 Amazon Gift Certificate

No matter who wins
One thing is a solid fact
Ilitch sucks my balls.

 

Re: Stanley Cup Final Haiku Contest..... Win a $50.00 Amazon Gift Certificate

Enter this contest
Buy a large club to bash seals
To oblivion

Buy a big hammer
Gift from the canadiens
To bash baby seals

Enter this contest
I am a pompous ass
Fuck the USA


Guess i will be DQ'd for violating rule #2.

That's OK with me
stuff your fifty and your rules
I prefer free speech.

 

Re: Stanley Cup Final Haiku Contest..... Win a $50.00 Amazon Gift Certificate

It's Men against boys
And the Mule is coming back
Maybe next year, Sid

Pens on Hockey Night
Ostrich on Discovery
Which will get ratings?

Bob Cole is brutal
Greg Millen's not much better
Where is Jim Hughson?

Good work Elliotte
Nice bit on lotto numbers
In pre game intro

Penguins are greasy
A frustrated bunch of kids
Watch what happens now

 

Re: Stanley Cup Final Haiku Contest..... Win a $50.00 Amazon Gift Certificate

penguin power fails
wings soar over black flippers
visions of red cup