"That little ball of fluff you own is a natural born killer"

When I was a kid, our cat birthed a litter of kittens underneath my bed. A few days later, before their eyes were even opened, she brought them a small mouse and seemed to be teaching them how to kill it.
That cat was awesome. She was a stray my dad brought home. Kind, gentle and loving around the house, but not afraid to hunt down critters as big as squirrels just for the hell of it. She'd leave for days at a time, come back home for a bit, and be just as lovey-dovey as she ever was.
I'm a dog person now, but I sure did love that cat.

 

That's because when you're door is closed, the cat can't get in to suck out a little of your soul that night. They're evil. Pure evil.

 

No reason to regulate cats, because criminals will get ahold of them anyway.

 

If all cat owners are sneaky, and your GF owns a cat ...

Don't let her find out you have figured out this syllogism. you might not be safe.