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First-world problems

Discussion in 'Anything goes' started by 3_Octave_Fart, Mar 6, 2015.

  1. Batman

    Batman Well-Known Member

    In a related gripe, there was no good porn on PornHub the other night. It was all granny gangbangs, fat women with too many tattoos, and surveillance video-quality amateur bullshit.
     
    sostartled and Vombatus like this.
  2. Ace

    Ace Well-Known Member

    Sure it's thin and scratchy, but I buy Scott's because it's cheaper, lasts longer and the kids don't clog the toilet with it like they do with that fancy two-ply.

    You should have good health insurance, though. Doctors like to order colonoscopies to doublecheck the reason for the anal bleeding.
     
  3. Vombatus

    Vombatus Well-Known Member

    And Scotts is less likely to leave dingleberries.
     
    Ace likes this.
  4. expendable

    expendable Well-Known Member

    Yeah, but how well does Scott's clean up after a marathon porn session?
     
  5. MTM

    MTM Well-Known Member

    Went to Walmart today (I know, third world), and a woman in front on me wrote a check. Slide the debit card and move on grandma.
     
  6. Riptide

    Riptide Well-Known Member

    Truly a first-world problem.

    Shaming the elderly, I mean.
     
  7. FileNotFound

    FileNotFound Well-Known Member

    I wish my robot vacuum cleaner wasn't so loud.
     
  8. Baron Scicluna

    Baron Scicluna Well-Known Member

    God bless you.
     
  9. Spartan Squad

    Spartan Squad Well-Known Member

    I had an amazing burrito for lunch with even more amazing hot sauce from local taqueria. Just had it pass through me--hot sauce included. My asshole is now on fire.
     
  10. MisterCreosote

    MisterCreosote Well-Known Member

    I can't find a Coke bottle with my name on it.
     
    Vombatus likes this.
  11. Vombatus

    Vombatus Well-Known Member

    My Firefox session crashed, and all 18 tabs I had disappeared, and because of a misfire on my part, I missed the one opportunity to Restore Previous Session. Now I have to try to remember what I had open, or dig through my history for each site.

    Goddamnit, I like tab clutter!!! Now they are gone. I am going nuts. Time for my OCD pills.
     
  12. three_bags_full

    three_bags_full Well-Known Member

    Got off work at lunch and headed to the golf course. Played three shitty holes and the bottom fell out. I was walking and on the back side of the course with nothing but trees for shelter. I only played nine.
     
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