Man Dies During Sex with Scarecrow (and that's not even the weird part)

A kinky Argentinian man croaked while having sex with a scarecrow that he dressed in lipstick and a wig — and strapped a sex toy on, according to reports.

Jose Alberto, 58, was found dead in his San Jose de Balcare home, lying next to the straw doll, the Irish Mirror reported.

"There were no signs of violence, and we are working on the assumption that the man died during sex with the scarecrow," police spokesman Rodolfo Moure told the publication.

The depraved sex fiend, who tended to sheep, had puffed up the scarecrow with clothes and tied a 6-inch strap-on penis to it, reports said.

His rotting remains were found after neighbors complained to police of a foul stench coming from his home, where he lived alone.

Man dies during sex with scarecrow he strapped sex toy on - NY Daily News

 

Well, I can see where it would difficult to resist those pursed lips and come hither look.

 

RSW
6

 

She's got nothin' on the mannequin Kramer made out with on Seinfeld.

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who tended to sheep

Yeah. He could only tend to sheep. Cause that would be just too weird.

 

Talk about a roll in the hay!

 

So the Lion got killed, and the Scarecrow was raped.
It's not looking good for the Tin Man this week.

Also, where the fuck is Dorothy?

 

How was this not in the Post?

 

RIP Vombatus

 

I just hope Freq wasn't taking notes.

 

I could while away the hours
Conferrin' with the flowers
Consultin' with the rain
And my strap-on I'd be scratchin'
While my owner was a catchin'
His death in the rain

 

Someone needs to make a straw man argument.