Pro-Trump News Writer!

Posted for entertainment purposes only. For most of us, that is.


Pro-Trump News Writer

compensation: $20 Per Article
employment type: full-time

Job Description:

Your duties will include assisting our senior editor to produce high-quality content for our magazine-style website. Your task is then to develop a well-written article about the given topic. You will work very closely with our Senior Editor and will be expected to learn many things along the way as you become a better writer and editor yourself.

At the start of every day you will have sources. You will use these sources to write an article. You will find pictures, videos, tweets, and more to add to each article. Each article is expected to be no less than 1,000 words.

We are a rapidly expanding company and have already had our first wave of writers move up with promotions to editorial positions. If you are looking to work hard and learn a lot while growing with us, the up-side is huge.

Responsiveness over email, Skype, phone, and any other form of communication utilizes is absolutely critical to our success. If you can't respond promptly at all times you are expected to be working, don't bother applying.

If you are a highly-driven individual with a solid competency for writing, this may be the perfect position for you. You will be paid for each and every quality article that you help create. Therefore, if you maintain high accessibility and have a strong work ethic, you will be able to make very good money.

Most of our writers require at least an hour to develop a strong piece of content. While there is no time limit to create an article, your pay is heavily dependent on the results you produce; please do not apply if you are just looking for "the next thing." We only retain writers who put in the effort. In return we have rewarded these writers greatly with large pay increases.

Furthermore, it will be very beneficial for you to have a strong background in politics. Does this mean you need to understand the fine workings our out government's political process? Absolutely not. However, you will be served well by having concurrent knowledge on the state of politics in the country.

Additionally, you MUST identify as a Conservative. The more Conservative that you consider yourself, the better. This will make it much easier for you to develop strong articles. We LOVE Trump and are absolutely disgusted with the level of corruption shown by the Democratic party in the last few months.

Bottom Line, if you are highly driven, willing to learn, and excited to stick with us in the long term as we grow and expand, this may be the perfect job for you!

DO NOT APPLY IF:
• You have trouble using Microsoft Suite, Skype, or any other Basic Software
• You are a liberal
• You don't LOVE Trump
• You plan on just "getting by"

We pay $20 per article when you first start out. You will be expected to write 5 articles a day for a total of 25-35 articles a week. If you have ANY issues with this, look elsewhere. There are no negotiations regarding this.

Thank-you for your time.

Pro-Trump News Writer

 

$20 for 1,000 words, plus you'll find pictures, videos, tweets, and more.

Sounds yuuugge. It'll be great.

 

I could pretend to love Trump, but not for less than a dollar a word.

 

This has Old Tony written all over it.

 

Words fail me. Honestly. At what point did we just give up and stop paying people for their time? Guess I'm overreacting to a craigslist ad. But goddammit. You want content, FUCKING PAY FOR IT!

 

He wouldn't dare move these jobs offshore.

 

20 bucks per story. Cheap-ass bastards.

If I take the full hour to research and write my epic "Donald Trump is a tiny-fingered, Cheeto-faced, ferret-wearing shitgibbon" am I disqualified? (Love those Scottish insults)

 

Tony should just block and copy every post of his from the last 14 months. Easy scratch.

 

Good to see the Mike Pence News Agency is getting off the ground.

 

I love how they give the highly driven Trump-loving writers the idea that they could make $160 a day easy if they churn out eight 1,000 srong pieces of content from their sources.

After you bash Hillary, Mexicans, Muslims, Hillary, Obama, protesters and Hillary, where do you get the eighth article?

And where do you get the strength, and adjectives, to do it all again the next day?

 

It's not that hard when your only "source" is your own imagination.

 

Does this count as creating jobs?