2020-21 Baseball Offseason Thread

Too easy

 

The Marlins logo looks like that special black paper you used in elementary school art class where you used a wood stylus to draw a picture and the colors showed through.

 

They’ll start attending Marlins games en masse during the pandemic and then stop the moment it ends.

Just because...shrug...MIAMI!

 

Fernando Tatis Jr.’s $340 million contract will be shared with a firm that invested in him when he was a teenager

I remember reading about these deals in SI. I have to think some lawyers will get involved at some point. I don't doubt that he took the money, but a) I do wonder if at that age he was fully aware what he was agreeing to. And I assume the firm confirmed he was old enough to sign the contract. b) I imagine the firm "screens" players and doesn't offer these "deals" to scrubs. c) He received a $700k signing bonus from the White Sox when they signed him. And his dad made over $17m in career salary. What the hell is Tatis Jr. doing signing away a chunk of his earnings? For a max of $500k?

 

That’s beyond joking BAC. That’s “I need help” drunk.

That’s like 10 drinks in an hour.

 

Today’s lesson — Jail sucks

Johnny Damon Released After DUI Arrest and Says Jail Sucks

So far I’ve seen him as an ex-Yankee, Red Sox, Tiger and Ray. I’m sure the Kansas City and NoCal outlets followed suit

 

That’s a long shift and a hell of a lot more than 10 drinks

 

Where’s police enthusiasm for physical arrests when you need them?

 

And 2 drinks short of thinking his wife is attractive.

 

I doubt he got any farther into the facility than a holding cell, to be honest. They wouldn't have any reason to place him in gen pop, knowing he was going to be bonded once he got sober.

 

That's probably 15 or 20 beers over 5-6 hours.