Any good scar stories

So who here has any funny or overall good scar stories?

 

Like having a tractor explode when you're brush hogging, getting doused with fuel, suffering third-degree burns on your left leg, going to a debridement tank repeatedly over a week, getting multiple skin grafts over the next two years and winding up with a leg that looks like a shark took a bite out of the inside of the shin?

 

No, he said good or overall.

 

Six years ago I had a brief - very brief - period with a fixed-gear bike. On the half-mile ride home from the bike shop, I slowed down to turn left onto my street ... and I forgot about the whole pedals keep turning thing. The scars from that superficial but very painful and bloody wreck are still present on my left knee and left hand.

 

But it's a good story! Especially the part where if I'd jumped to the right when getting off the tractor, I'd be dead - since the engine exploded in that direction.

 

Not a true scar, but as a pitcher I took a wicked line drive off my shin, and five minutes later there was a hematoma lump the size of a golf ball 4 inches below my knee. Doctor said it would go away on its own, so he didn't see the need to have it drained or whatever.

It went away on its own, yeah, but it took 10 years. So for 10 years I had that ugly bump, though after a month it was down to the size of a marble. A big, ugly marble.

 

When I was kindergarten age I was going outside through a storm door and my friend Chris slammed the door shut behind him, and I went right through the glass. I had to have 9 stitches on my left arm.

ADD: I also have a cyst right on top of my left kneecap that I think resulted from getting a thorn stuck there. I've had it since at least the mid-90s and sometimes it gets irritated just by wearing long pants. I'm thinking of going full Chef and getting a case and a straight razor one day.

 

How about the one about when he killed the Lion King?

 

I have a group of three parallel scars about four inches long on my left calf that appears to be claw scratch marks.
If anyone asks, I got it while rescuing orphans from a thought-extinct sabertooth bear ... on my way to volunteer at a homeless shelter ... on Sunday ... in the middle of a hurricane.*





*Well, the Sunday part is true. Otherwise, I had been drinking, decided to bust a big rock with a sledge hammer, and a very large, jagged piece of limestone slabbed off and got me.

 

A few years ago I was trying to take a handsaw out of its plastic packaging. It was being stubborn, and once it came loose it came out fast and ripped my middle finger open. Lots of blood, so I wrapped it up in a paper towel and drove myself to the emergency room. By the time they got to look at me 45 minutes later the bleeding had stopped and I felt like a wuss. They put in a couple of stitches, which I took out myself a week later. The last part made me feel like a badass, at last.

Last year I got a nice burn scar on my forearm while trying to retrieve a frozen french fry from the back of the oven.

As a kid, me and some friends were playing Wiffle ball. We had one of those cheap plastic bats where the two halves are melted together, and there is a hard seam that's about as sharp as a katana blade. I was playing catcher and standing too close behind my friend when he swung, and he caught me right under the eye. Next thing I know, there's blood running down my arm and I freaked out. Ran about a block home, screaming the whole time, and leaving a blood trail along the way.
Wound up getting two stitches under my eye and a lifetime vow to only use quality Wiffle Ball brand products from then on.

 

Where do we stand on allowing @Chef2 to post on this thread?