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Coach Feetch

Discussion in 'Writers' Workshop' started by LemMan, Jan 10, 2007.

  1. LemMan

    LemMan Member

    Fire away, ladies and gents...

    http://www.bradenton.com/mld/bradenton/sports/16395872.htm
     
    LemMan, Jan 10, 2007
    #1
  2. pallister

    pallister Guest

    No shortcuts, indeed. This story's way too long. ;D
     
    pallister, Jan 10, 2007
    #2
  3. Angola!

    Angola! Guest

    I really liked your opening. I thought you tied it all back in very well. Good story, though on the lengthy side.
    I know some don't like to break stories up with subheads - DyePack says hi - but I thought it worked really well in this instance.
     
    Angola!, Jan 10, 2007
    #3
  4. hackhack

    hackhack New Member

    For your audience, this guy has been such a success that this story deserves its length. What kind of reaction did it get? Was it what you hoped for?

    Wondering if you didn't pick a quote for your ending, how would you have ended it?
     
    hackhack, Jan 12, 2007
    #4
  5. LemMan

    LemMan Member

    hack -

    I got a couple of complimentary phone calls. As for what reaction I was hoping for, I gave up trying to gauge public reaction long ago. I was happy with it, though, and it's rare I can read over one of my stories and not pick it apart.

    Thanks for posting.
     
    LemMan, Jan 13, 2007
    #5
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