College Football Week 8: The Ol' Head Ball Coach has a swamp. In his pants.

This week's top games, featuring the SportsJournalists.com poll, Sportsbook.ag's early lines and p.m. Eastern times:

Tuesday, Oct. 16

Louisiana-Lafayette (-4) at North Texas, 9, ESPN
Mean Joe Greene is not impressed by Jake Delhomme. But, hey, football on a Tuesday!

Thursday, Oct. 18

Houston (-6) at Southern Methodist, 8
The Cougars, the Mustangs and Southern Mississippi were the three of the four best teams in Conference USA last season. This year, they're 5-13 combined.

No. 2 Oregon (-9½) at Arizona State, 9, ESPN
Arizona State no longer has a 6-8 starting quarterback. Oregon no longer has a 5-8 starting running back. The broadcasters might have to talk about football.

Friday, Oct. 19

Connecticut at Syracuse (-4½), 8, ESPN
It's like ESPN is forcing people to go out on Friday nights.

Saturday, Oct. 20

No. 6 LSU (-3) at No. 20 Texas A&M, 12, ESPN
Les Miles is worried he might be the next Tiger to get injured, so he's eating all the grass he can get his hands on to fortify his mystical earth strength.

Purdue at No. 7 Ohio State (-18), 12, ABC/ESPN2
Urban Meyer's so good he's made Big Ten football interesting and watchable.

No. 18 Rutgers (-5) at Temple, 12
We're ranking Big East teams because there's no one else to rank at this point.

Virginia Tech at No. 15 Clemson (-9), 12, ABC/ESPN2
Beamer Ball has cascaded into awfulness as the Hokies run the risk of not hitting double-digit wins for the first time since joining the ACC.

Iowa State at Oklahoma State (-14), 12, FX
Paul Rhoads is responsible for two of the Cyclones' five road wins against ranked opponents. Mike Gundy is responsible for zero Cowboys national championship game berths.

Auburn at Vanderbilt (-7), 12:20
This is the Tigers' last realistic shot at an SEC win this season.

No. 22 Stanford (-3) at California, 3, Fox
Stepfan Taylor's knees don't touch the ground when he Tebows.

No. 10 South Carolina at No. 3 Florida (-3), 3:30, CBS
Coaching swap proposal: Will Muschamp to his alma mater, Georgia; Mark Richt to his alma mater, Miami (Fla.); Al Golden to his alma mater, Penn State; Bill O'Brien to his old job, Patriots offensive coordinator; Josh McDaniels to his first employer, Michigan State; Mark Dantonio to his alma mater, South Carolina; Steve Spurrier to his alma mater, Florida. Who loses? And tell me I didn't blow your mind.

BYU at No. 5 Notre Dame (-13½), 3:30, NBC
What ever happened to separation of church and football?

South Florida at No. 17 Louisville (-7), 3:30, ABC
This Big East undefeateds thing could be really obnoxious.

No. 19 Texas Tech (-2½) at No. 25 TCU, 3:30, ABC/ESPN2
Is this supposed to be a rivalry game now?

UNLV at No. 23 Boise State (-27½), 3:30, NBC Sports Network
Anyone else feel like they're ranking the Broncos out of habit?

Michigan State at Michigan (-10), 3:30, Big Ten Network
Remember Mike Hart? He rushed for 110 yards the last time the Wolverines beat the Spartans.

Colorado at No. 11 Southern Cal (-41), 6
That line is not a typo. Lane Kiffin will go for two after every touchdown to ensure it's reached.

No. 1 Alabama (-20½) at Tennessee, 7, ESPN
Nick Saban called Gary Pinkel to apologize for LaMichael Fanning's hit on Missouri running back Russel Hansbrough. There will be no apologies for Saban's own hit on Derek Dooley's job security.

No. 4 Kansas State at No. 13 West Virginia (-3), 7, Fox
As the Big 12 continues to cannibalize itself, Dana Holgorsen purchases flame-retardant furniture.

Kansas at No. 9 Oklahoma (-35), 9
The Jayhawks are the only below-average team in the Big 12. Good work, Charlie Weis.

No. 13 Georgia (-28) at Kentucky, 7
The Red and Black faithful are already sipping cocktails.

Middle Tennessee at No. 14 Mississippi State (-20), 7, ESPN2
We're told the Bulldogs will play a worthwhile opponent at some point this season.

No. 21 Cincinnati (-7) at Toledo, 7
The Rockets may be the best team on the schedule for any of the three unbeaten Big East teams.

No. 12 Florida State (-18) at Miami (Fla.), 8, ABC
EJ Manuel is fifth in the country in passer rating. Stephen Morris is 84th. Yet Morris has thrown 85 more passes in the same number of games.

Baylor at Texas (-10), 8, ABC
The Longhorns' quarterback turned to ashes against Oklahoma. Get it? Ashes. 'Cause his name is David Ash.

Penn State at Iowa (-3), 8
Context: Joe Paterno was older than Hayden Fry.

Utah at No. 8 Oregon State (-10), 10:30, ESPN2
The Beavers love a little In-N-Out.

 

Re: College Football Week 8: The Ol' Ball Coach has a swamp. In his pants.

Iowa State at Oklahoma State (-14)

This line is absurd, right?

 

Re: College Football Week 8: The Ol' Ball Coach has a swamp. In his pants.

Texas as a double-digit favorite against a team with a pulse sets off alarm bells.

Most interesting game to me is LSU-Pretend Army School. Now that the Aggies have their offense fully cranked up, will be fascinating to see how it matches up with an elite ESS-EE-SEE defense.

 

Re: College Football Week 8: The Ol' Ball Coach has a swamp. In his pants.

I will take Baylor to win outright.

 

Re: College Football Week 8: The Ol' Ball Coach has a swamp. In his pants.

Coaching swap proposal: Will Muschamp to his alma mater, Georgia; Mark Richt to his alma mater, Miami (Fla.); Al Golden to his alma mater, Penn State; Bill O'Brien to his old job, Patriots offensive coordinator; Josh McDaniels to his first employer, Michigan State; Mark Dantonio to his alma mater, South Carolina; Steve Spurrier to his alma mater, Florida. Who loses?

I am curious who y'all think gets the best of this deal. I could see the argument that Michigan State is the loser, but McDaniels might make a great college head coach given his personality and offense and is also 20 years younger and presumably healthier than Dantonio.

 

Re: College Football Week 8: The Ol' Ball Coach has a swamp. In his pants.

As a Penn Stater, I want no part of this trade.

 

Re: College Football Week 8: The Ol' Ball Coach has a swamp. In his pants.

I'd like to know who was president the last time Vandy was a touchdown favorite in an SEC game.

Also Versatile, it's HEAD Ball Coach, not Ol' Ball Coach.

 

Re: College Football Week 8: The Ol' Ball Coach has a swamp. In his pants.

I thought it was Ol' Ball Coach now, Head Ball Coach at Florida?

 

Re: College Football Week 8: The Ol' Ball Coach has a swamp. In his pants.

I'm guessing the wise guys realize there is some easy money to be made. Hell, I figure Texas will have to score 70 to beat Baylor by 10 with the Longhorns sorry ass defense.

 

Re: College Football Week 8: The Ol' Ball Coach has a swamp. In his pants.

After the Spartans limp along to six wins and a bowl loss this season, their fans might take that swap.

 

I'm saying trick question...it's never happened.

 

2008 Vandy, which went 7-6, won the Music City Bowl, and had wins over South Carolina and Auburn (yeah, both those teams sucked that year, but stick with me here), hosted a Tennessee team late in the year that had just lost to Wyoming and fired Fulmer. So maybe that?

(Of course they lost.)