Dumb Injuries

So I fractured my tibia and fibula playing beer league hockey last night. Was going for a puck and slid feet first into the boards. Got a ride to the ER in an ambulance and have a temporary splint until I can get into an orthopedist later this week. In terms of pain, holy f does this hurt. It's a constant ache with occasional stabs and pops. I should be on some hard pain meds later today, but right now I'm on my own.

I guess I have two questions:
1) Anyone else ever go through something like this? Online it says 12 week recovery period if I don't need surgery. It sounds like a clean break so I should be good there. I just don't what I should expect in terms of getting up and around. I have a 2 year old and a pretty heavy work schedule, so being stuck in bed is not feasible.

2) Anyone else want to share a story about an injury they got and how they coped? I need reading material for the next few days apparently.

 

Hope you've found your way to some painkillers by now. Jesus.

 

My dumb injury story. A few years back, I finally bench 300 for the first time. Just two reps, but I was crazy hyped up nonetheless. Too hyped. Went to do some incline presses at 135 and when I went to put the bar back on the rack, I overshot it. Instead of just letting the damn barbell fall to the floor, I stupidly tried to stop it. Gravity won, and I ended up with a partial rotator cuff tear that put me on the shelf for a few months.

 

A friend of mine climbed a flagpole when he was a kid. He slid back down and caught his testicles on the pole's cleat for tying off the ropes. Ripped open his nutsack.

Somehow, they put him back together. Today he is happily married and has two kids.

As far as injuries to the nuts go, that's the worst I have heard.

The horror, the horror....

 

1) I was playing golf with two friends and had my own cart. Hit a drive way right of the fairway and drove my cart down to where the ball was. After I hit, instead of driving back on flat ground about 30 seconds to where I came from, I decided to go up a jagged hill to the fairway. The cart flipped on its side and ended up with my left leg pinned under the cart. Took about 5 minutes before my friends found me. My leg was pretty bruised but it was more embarrassing than anything. It's been 12 years and they never have let me live it down.

2) When I had been a lawyer for few months, we had a big meeting with a prospective client on Monday. My job was to research a unique issue and explain the state of the law -- it was a huge opportunity for me given my lack of experience. The afternoon before the meeting, I am playing hoops at a court with a chain link fence a few feet past one of the baselines. My team has a fast break and someone throws me a pass a few feet ahead of me. I realize I can't reach it and rather than stop short, I decide to jump into the fence to stop my momentum. Only problem is that the fence was loose and when I planted my foot and grad the fence, It gives way and I smashed my face into a bar in the fence. I ended up showing up to this big meeting with a massive bruise and my left eye basically closed. My bosses were not pleased.

 

MAN
BREAKS
PENIS

/hammer hed in Jamaica Star. Guy cheating on wife, pounding mistress, misses hole, bends dick into boomerang.

 

I was benching 100-pound dumbbells and successfully did 10 reps. Sat up and had the dumbbells on my legs. When I put the dumbbells down on the floor my left arm gave out. Torn bicep.

Should have had a spotter and as I was in a Golds Gym there were plenty of people I could have asked.

Stupid on my part.

 

I was playing broom hockey while in college and as I chased the ball into the corner I glimpsed one of my best friends behind me. I knew he would drive me into the boards, as I would him, so I turtled and took the check, hitting the boards face first.
I thought I had broken my rather large nose, but later over beer and burgers, my left knee started to throb.
The same guy who hit me drove me to the ER, where they discovered I had a broken knee cap. I was in a cast about six weeks.

 

A guy I used to work with suffered a torn knee ligament dancing.

An old friend, casually sitting at a bar, wrapped his leg around the leg of the barstool. After a few pops, he keeled over. He and the stool hit the floor: Broken leg.

 

Dear god, I wish I could unread that.

 

I know. Sorry. Like the weightlifting post, the accident involved gravity and being out of control. It was unfathomable. But it did have a happy ending, just not the kind we ask for at a massage parlor.

 

We were moving a couple years ago and had a bunch of our stuff stored in the garage that was getting moved into a Sea Can. My neighbour stopped to see if he could help and I asked him if he could come back in 10 minutes just to lift one end of a piano into the can, a distance of about 9 inches.

I didn't feel like waiting and decided to lift the one end in myself. Instantly I knew something was wrong but as it was the first thing being loaded I could not stop until I had the can loaded.

The next morning I could not feel my leg and had to roll out of bed and crawl on the floor to the bathroom. Loaded up on every kind of over the counter muscle relaxer that I could find.

I made it in to work the day after that but no position was comfortable. Miraculously got into to see my doctor who sent me for an x-ray. It turned out I had pinched a nerve.

I had never had back issues in my life and have a whole new level of empathy for those who suffer from them.

My wife gives me shit to this day for not waiting for my neighbour to help.