If TV and movie journalists were real...

... what would their co-workers think of them?

Haven't watched in a while, but for some reason today I started thinking about "Fletch" and wondering what the other people at his newspaper perceive him.
I bet they think he's a world class douchebag.
Editors have got to hate him. He writes one story every six months, it seems, and he still barely makes deadline.
Ad reps must despise him for the same reason. They promo his story, and he's struggling to squeak it in.
Other reporters probably loathe him. He's hardly ever in the building, yet still rates a personal secretary and an office. And don't get them started on the allowances made for his tacky decorations. Plus, the guy shows up once a month, maybe, acts like he owns the place and makes fun of everybody. What a dick. Meanwhile, there's a dozen reporters busting their ass and cranking out five stories a day who haven't gotten raises in three years because this jackoff is trying to put wetsuits and Lakers tickets on his expense account.
The business office? They probably need five full-time people just to keep up with his expenditures. I know it was the 80s and times were different, but how his editor keeps a job when he signs off on those expense accounts is beyond me.

Anyway, what about other famous TV and movie journalists? If they worked in real newsrooms, what would people think of them?
Woodward and Bernstein, as portrayed in "All the President's Men," always kind of struck me as assholes for some reason.

 

Lois Lane - probably putting out for those "Superman exclusives." Also - not very good at seeing people as they truly are. Easily duped.

Bob Woodward - Woodward using his Yale secret society connections, probably a CIA operative. Used by his handlers to get Nixon.
http://www.ctka.net/pr196-woodward.html

J. Jonah Jameson - a dinosaur, a walking harassment lawsuit waiting to happen, throws around nickels like they're manhole covers.

 

Still waiting for a managing editor that looks like Glenn Close or Bebe Neuwirth.

 

The editors at Ed O'Neill's paper in "Blue Chips" probably wanted to beat the shit out of him for giving away that big scoop at Coach Pete Bell's post-game presser.

 

Perry White probably wonders why his nerdy reporter has the same- sounding voice as Superman.

 

And why his supposedly best reporter, who is secretly off fighting alien overlords on another planet, doesn't come to work or file so much as a crime brief for months at a time.

 

But voices aren't an identifying factor! I mean..the nerd wears glasses! Superman would NEVER need glasses!

 

Jack Forrester in Jagged Edge. Editor of a large paper gets accused of murdering his wife and a maid. And stays on the job during the court case. And has a long-running feud with the DA, which carries out in print. I'm guessing we'd see a lot of stories on Poynter questioning this move.

(Not to mention, he was apparently too dumb to realize double jeopardy was attached so who in the hell cares if his attorney found a typewriter that had nothing to do with the actual murders. Not the man I want leading a newspaper.)

 

I've worked with Murray Slaughter a few times.

 

HENRY HACKETT DOESN'T WORK IN THE FUCKING WORLD!! HE WORKS IN FUCKING NEW YORK CITY!!!!

But he's married to early-30s Marisa Tomei, so there is that.

 

Does Ray Barrone ever work? I want to say there was one episode where he was covering a game from watching it on TV. I mean, at least you saw Oscar Madison in a press box every once in awhile.

 

Literary Fletch is so much better than novel Fletch.

Ever seen "The Mean Season" with Kurt Russell? Not very well known flick from the '80s. He plays a crime reproter who is stalked by a serial killer. The whole time, he's whining about how tough it is on him emotionally to interview victims and family members of victims. Kurt, no one put a gun to your head and told you that crime reporting was the only job you could ever do. Ever. Shut the hell up and work on your resume. (And you're banging young Mariel Hemingway, so there's that.)