In-n-Out: Overrated.

And as we all know, you're a man who knows his fast food.

 

I love me some gyros, but that combination seems weird. It's probably damn good, but I'm getting heartburn just picturing it. I think I'd rather have the Gyros sauce (not gonna try to spell it) instead of feta.

Does the gyro meat come off the spit, or the grill? If it's not cut off the spit by an exceedingly hairy employee, your burger fails miserably.

 

Damn straight. You don't down a McGangbang and not gain some credibility on the subject.

 

Off the spit. I wouldn't accept anything less.

Bear in mind, it isn't crumbled feta cheese, it's an entire fucking pat of feta cheese. It's about a half-inch thick.

And hell yes it gives you heartburn.

But now that you mention it, tzatziki sauce would be pretty damn good on a burger.

Greek pizza is the shit too.

I have zero percent Greek blood in me, but dammit if I don't want to run my own Greek fast food joint.

 

My only claim to fast-food fame is the summer I got addicted to In-N-Out 4X4s (four patties, four slices of cheese), which ended - predictably - with gall bladder surgery.

And, never a bad time to post this:



http://www.whatupwilly.com/2006/01/in-n-out-100x100.html

 

Yikes!

 

Hey, I stuck to one at each sitting.

Usually.

 

I've tried Whataburger about six times in different cities. Sucked. Every. Single. Time.

 

I tried for a long time to not jack this thread beyond the initial discussion of In N Out and Five Guys and WhateverOtherBurger shops everyone prefers. But we're on the fifth page of this thing now, so here goes.

You're a coward if you don't think the best burger in the world is in your hometown.

Now this doesn't mean that if you grew up Newark, you can't think New York has the best burger, or if you grew up in Arlington Heights, you can't think Chicago has the best burger, or whatever or wherever. The boundaries do extend beyond your own hometown's city limits. But within reason. If you grew up in Burbank, please don't tell me the best burger in the world is on the menu at some little shack outside Austin. You tell me that, you're a coward.

You can have favorites. Some of us love In N Out because of its regionalization, because of the fact that we can't have it, so we want it -- absence makes the heart grow fonder and all that. Some of us love Five Guys. Others, Kuna or Fuddrucker's or WhatABurger.

Me? I'm no coward. I'll always love Swenson's (http://www.swensonsdriveins.com/). Little drive-in, started in 1934 in Akron. The menu has grown, even from what it was a decade or so ago, and you can get salads now and vegetable beef stew and fried chicken and shrimp dinners. I don't know anybody who goes to Swenson's for the shrimp dinners. You get a hamburger or a cheeseburger or a half-pounder. I've always heard that brown sugar is the secret ingredient in the beef, but no matter what makes it taste so good, it hangs over the bun, and the cheese rolls out from between the patties, and you need all the napkins they give you. They had 17 milk shake flavors when most places still had three. I don't know how many they have now, because I always get chocolate.

If you're ever in Akron -- or Kent or Canton -- drive in and flash your lights. The burgers are delicious. But unless you grew up in Northeast Ohio, don't bother telling me they're the best in the world.

 

I lived in NE Ohio for quite a while. I used to go to the Swenson's in Cuyahoga Falls.

It was all right, but it was definitely one of those places that locals loved that non-locals kind of shook their heads over.

Kind of like Cousins' subs in Wisconsin. I could sustain my entire life on them, but everytime Cousins tries to branch out beyond the Wisconsin diaspora, it fails (except in Arizona for some reason).

 

Luckily, my hometown has the best food in the world anyway.