Obama skewers Trump, gets skewered himself at White House Correspondent's Dinner

Some good stuff from the annual yuk-fest, one of my favorite events of the year.

SNL comedian Seth Meyers, on Obama's chances in 2012:
"I know who could definitely beat you. 2008 Barack Obama. You would have loved him. So charismatic, so charming. Was he a little too idealistic? Maybe. But you would have loved him."

Meyers on Obama aging, noting Michelle Obama hadn't aged:
"What happened to you? When you were sworn in, you looked like the guy from the Old Spice commercials. Now you look like Louis Gossett, Sr. I've never said this to anyone before, but maybe you should start smoking again."

"Mr. President, look at your hair. If your hair gets any whiter, the Tea Party is going to endorse it."

Obama, for his part, reacted better than the crowd, which was a mix of stunned shock (lots of oohing and aahing"), laughter, and applause. Obama also nodded with a wry smile at the idealistic quip and burst out laughing at the age quips.

Obama on Paul Ryan missing from the event:
"He's not here because his budget has no room for laughter."

Obama on Michelle Bachmann's presidential aspirations:
"I hear she's thinking about running for President, which is weird, because I heard she was born in Canada. (pause) Yes, Michelle, this is how it starts."

Obama on his dropping poll numbers:
"I've even let down one of my core constituencies, movie stars. Matt Damon said he was disappointed in my performance. Well, Matt, I just saw the Adjustment Bureau. Right back at ya, buddy."

Obama on birth certificate:
"Just in case there are any lingering questions, tonight I'm prepared to go a step further. Tonight, for the first time, I am releasing my official birth video. I warn you, no one has seen this footage in 50 years. Not even me. But let's take a look. (Subsequently plays the "Circle of Life" video clip from the Lion King"). Oh well, back to square one. I want to make clear to the Fox News table, that was a joke. That was not my real birth video. That was a children's cartoon. Call Disney if you don't believe me. They have the real long term birth video."

Obama on Trump, who was in attendance:
"No one is prouder to put this birth certificate matter to rest than 'the Donald'." And that's because he can finally get back to focusing on the issues that matter. Like, did we fake the moon landing? What really happened in Roswell? And where are Biggie and Tupac?"

Also called Trump's decisions on "The Apprentice", such as firing Gary Busey, "The kinds of decisions that would keep me up at night."

 

Moddy reportedly was there. Wish he had sent a play-by-play.

 

By the way, Obama and Meyers' full presentations are up on YouTube, posted by CSPAN.

 

Meyers:

"(Trump has) said he's got a great relationship with 'the blacks.' Unless the Blacks are a family of white people, I bet he's mistaken."

 

Trump's pompous stone-faced glare at both Obama and Meyers was priceless.

"Donald Trump often talks about running as a Republican, which is surprising," Meyers said. "I just assumed he was running as a joke."

 

The Trump stuff tonight was tougher than he got at the Comedy Central roast. I almost felt sorry for him...almost.

 

No chance. Feeling sorry for self-reverential oafs ain't in the game plan.

 

Trump deserved every bit of it by keeping this charade going. He asked for the attention, he's getting it.

Absolutely hilarious stuff from Meyers.

 

My two favorites:

Katie Couric leaving CBS News. She is most well-known for asking tough questions like....name a newspaper.

The Huffington Post afterparty joke was great, too.

 

The CSPAN stuff was funny. "People have been looking for bin Laden for years and yet, he hosts a show on CSPAN from 3-4 in the afternoon."

Also laughed when nobody got the joke of Goldman Sacks throwing in NBC on a credit default swap - even funnier - nobody in the room got it.