Televised Obliteration: Mavs crush Kobe's LAL. Postscript - PJax, LAL fined 50K

108 - 72.

Wow.

That was one of the sickest, most embarrassing beatdowns I've ever seen.

On the recipient's home court.

Worst home loss ever by the LA Lakers.

The Kobe Lakers.

* * *

The most compelling accident scenes are often the ones you knew were coming.

Nobody thought the Lakers were going to stop Dallas' 16-game winning streak. Classic irresistible force versus the eminently movable object - you had to watch.

But I'm not sure anyone predicted a historical debacle.

After the Mavericks outscored the Lakers by 20 in the second quarter, no level of humiliation seemed impossible.

Somewhere, Shaq was laughing, Ric Bucher was crying, and Red Auerbach lit a cigar. Big Chief Triangle was about to lose six games in a row for the second time in his career. And the second time in about a month.

The Lakers were about to lose for the 18th time in 25 games. That is, for every 4 times they took the court, they lost 3. Home, road, no matter.

The team that fooled many was about to complete its fall from early-season grace with a sickening, deafening thud. On its own turf. For a national audience.

The All-Star MVP? 25% FG in the first half. Similar to his infamous 'quitting' game 7 against the Suns in last year's playoffs, he had only 3 shots in the 2nd half after jacking up 16 in the first half. 3 assists, 5 turnovers. MJ never, ever would have been 'done' like this. But this is not Michael Jordan. It's Kobe Bean Bryant. The latest, wanting MJ wannabe.

Got Shaq?

* * *

8 Heat players had double figures as Miami beat the Wizards. In the last 2+ weeks, the Heat - without D. Wade - have defeated the Pistons, Cavs, Bulls and Wizards, all teams above them in the Eastern Conference standings. The Bulls were savagely dispatched, as were the Pistons - until Saunders' gimmicky zone D made the final score seem respectable.

Barring another major injury, one team can stop the Heat before the NBA Finals - the Pistons. The Cavs? Not unless Lebron is possessed for 7 games. Not happening. The Bulls? Nope. Their interior defense (sorry, Ben) is not good enough to stop Shaq and 'Zo for 7 games. They were pistol-whipped by 30+ without Wade to afflict them. The Wizards? Please.

It all comes down to the Pistons. They have the offensive firepower. But their defense is too weak. Webber's great. Offensively. Shaq and 'Zo will terrorize Webber, R. Wallace, and McDyess. Big Ben is gone. The Pistons have completely lost their defensive identity and intensity since Brown left. The Pistons need to shoot the lights out to have a chance. The odds aren't in their favor. These Pistons are built for the regular season, not for the playoffs. Just like last year.

And just like last year against the heavily-favored Mavs, the Heat could win it all. One slip-up, one injury, one suspension, anything. It could happen again, if the Heat makes the NBA Finals.

* * *

You're a Lakers fan, or a Shaq-hater. A Kobe-lover, a Zen disciple.

Whatever.

This is one of those nights that will never be fully erased from your memory banks.

One of those "WHY THE HELL did we trade Shaq again?", "Who gives a DAMN about being the All-Star MVP!?" nights.

Hopelessness. Decisions made not to renew next year's season's tickets.

A day that caps off a week of "Kobe's a dirty player" talk.

A day when you realize, finally, that Kobe was named All-Defense last year on reputation alone.

A day you realize how dumb Bill Simmons was for saying Kobe Bryant was last year's MVP, or how Kobe's dunk on Nash was the defining moment of their playoff series, 3 games too soon.

A day you decide never to listen to Bucher when it comes to the Lakers, and especially when it comes to Kobe.

A day for a 36 point face-mashing on your home court.

The day the Lakers were booed off of that court by their fans, and rightfully so. And Lakers players laughed about it, while the boos rained down.

The day Pride left town.

A day in the life of the Lakers. These Lakers. The Lakers that missed the playoffs two years ago. The No-Shaq Lakers.

Kobe's Lakers.

He is your Custer.

* * *

Deja vu?

Shaq's holding up the NBA Championship trophy, after the Heat have beaten the Mavs.

But it's 2007, not 2006.

It's the 3rd Finals appearance for Diesel while not a member of the Lakers. His 2nd title without the Lakers.

Far away Jackson smirks, giving a knowing nod. Something about "I wrote this in my book" crosses his mind.

A man in his 60's, on a date with a girl in her 20's, shouts an obscenity. His date politely looks down, not fully understanding.

The +16 jersey number guy sits in silence, not willing to give a hint to his inner emotions. Even here, by himself, there will be no concession. None.

* * *

You're a Lakers fan, on this night. Or a Shaq-hater. Or a Kobe lover.

Your guy has overseen the worst home loss in LA Lakers history. You are praying you don't miss the playoffs for the 2nd time in 3 years.

This is your world; these are your fears.

There will be no titles, no cavalry coming over the hill.

A world not of thriving, but survival. At best.

 

Re: KOBE 'leads' the LAL to new depths - Ritual, nationally televised humiliation

This thread will not end well.

 

Re: KOBE 'leads' the LAL to new depths - Ritual, nationally televised humiliation

Jesus, Rok. O'Neal. Not, O'Neil. He's only one of the five best centers of all-time. Please fix.

 

Re: KOBE 'leads' the LAL to new depths - Ritual, nationally televised humiliation

Rok's alive!!!!!!!!!!

 

Re: KOBE 'leads' the LAL to new depths - Ritual, nationally televised humiliation

And he's been possessed by his bro!

 

Re: KOBE 'leads' the LAL to new depths - Ritual, nationally televised humiliation

It was a rather long post, wasn't it?

Rok 50 gazillion times cooler though. He's a comics fan, I think.

 

Re: KOBE 'leads' the LAL to new depths - Ritual, nationally televised humiliation

KOBE IS GAWD! HE IS CHARMION LOOK AT ALL HIS RINGZ YOU ARE LOOSER BOY HE IS BACK

 

Re: KOBE 'leads' the LAL to new depths - Ritual, nationally televised humiliation

C'mon, it's not like the Lakers were embarrassed by the Knicks or something.

The Mavs are going to make a lot of teams look bad this year, not just the Lake Show. Especially when motivated by the memory of their meltdown the last time at Staples or the 31-point blown fourth-quarter lead a few years ago.

No way the Mavs will end the year on a 38-game winning streak (it may well end at Golden State tonight — Nellie awaiting on a back-to-back), but 70 wins is realistic, and is I think almost expected at this point. Incredible to think they opened the year 0-4.

 

Re: KOBE 'leads' the LAL to new depths - Ritual, nationally televised humiliation

Worst home loss in L.A. Lakers history.

 

Re: KOBE leads LAL to historic low - uncharted, Nationally Televised humiliation

How can you not vote Kobe for MVP? He's doing it all, with guys named Smush! Step away from the haterade.
/chuck

 

Re: KOBE leads LAL to historic low - uncharted, Nationally Televised humiliation

I'd hate to have Rok as a lifeline on Who Wants to be a Millionaire.

"Rok, I've got 30 seconds, I need an answer, OK? What was the Lakers' biggest loss ever?"

"Well, fmrsped, it's like this.
108 - 72.

Wow.

That was one of the sickest, most embarrassing beatdowns I've ever seen.

On the recipient's home court.

Worst home loss ever by the LA Lakers.

The Kobe Lakers.

* * *

The most compelling accident scenes are often the ones you knew were coming.

I thought the Lakers would lose by 15 or so. Nobody thought they were going to stop Dallas' 16-game winning streak. Classic irresistible force versus the eminently movable object. You had to watch.

After the Mavericks outscored the Lakers by 20 in the second quarter, the floodgates were thrown open. Who knew how bad this was going to be? When would 'garbage time' start in earnest? The start of the second half?

Somewhere, Shaq was laughing, Ric Bucher was crying, and Red Auerbach lit a cigar. Big Chief Triangle was about to lose six games in a row for the second time in his career. And the second time in about two months.

The Lakers - once 13 games over .500 - were about to fall to 2 games over .500. About to lose their 18th in 25 games. The team that fooled many - this writer included - was about to complete its fall from grace with a sickening, awkward thud on its own turf.

What of the All-Star MVP? 25% on FGA in the first half. Similar to his infamous 'quitting' game 7 of the playoff series against the Suns, he had only 3 shots in the 2nd half after jacking up 16 in the first half. 3 assists, 5 turnovers.

Got Shaq?

* * *

O'Neil? He was one of 8 Heat players in double figures as they defeated the division-leading Wizards. In the last 2+ weeks, the Heat - without Dwayne Wade - have defeated the Cavs, Pistons, Bulls and Wizards, all teams above them in the Eastern Conference standings. The Bulls were savagely dispatched, as were the Pistons until Flip Saunders' gimmicky zone made the final score more respectable.

Barring another major injury, one team has a chance of stopping the Heat from returning to the NBA Finals - the Pistons. The Cavs? Not a chance unless Lebron becomes possessed for 7 games. Not happening. The Bulls? Not a chance. Interior defense (sorry, Ben) is not good enough to stop Shaq and 'Zo. I mean, they just got pistol-whipped by 30+ without Wade.

It all comes down to the Pistons. They have enough firepower to do it. But I can't see it - their defense is too weak. Webber's great. On offense. Shaq and 'Zo will terrorize Webber and Wallace. Big Ben is gone. The Pistons will have to shoot the lights out to have a chance. They could, but the odds aren't in their favor.

Just like last year, against the heavily favored Mavs, the Heat could win it all again. One slip-up, one injury, whatever. It could happen again.

* * *

You're a Lakers fan, or a Shaq-hater. A Kobe-lover, a Zen disciple.

Whatever.

This is one of those nights that will never fully be erased from your memory banks.

One of those "WHY THE HELL did we trade Shaq again?", "Caron Butler's an All-Star?", "Who gives a damn about the All-Star MVP!" nights.

Hopelessness. Decisions made not to renew next year's season's tickets.

A day that caps off a week of 'Kobe's a dirty player' talk.

A day when you realize, finally, that Kobe was named All-Defense last year on reputation alone.

A day you realize how dumb Bill Simmons was for saying Kobe Bryant was last year's MVP, or how Kobe's dunk on Nash was the defining moment of their playoff series, 3 games too soon.

A day you decide never to listen to Bucher when it comes to the Lakers, and especially when it comes to Kobe.

A day for a 36 point, face-mashing on your home court.

The day the Lakers were booed off of their court by their fans, and rightfully so. And they laughed about it.

A day in the life of the Lakers. These Lakers. The Lakers that missed the playoffs two years ago. The No-Shaq Lakers.

Kobe's Lakers. He is your Custer.

* * *

Deja vu?

Shaq's holding up the NBA Championship trophy, after the Heat have beaten the Mavs.

But it's 2007, not 2006.

It's the 3rd Finals appearance for Diesel while not a member of the Lakers. The 2nd title without the Lakers.

Jackson smirks far away, giving a knowing nod. Something about 'I wrote this in my book' crosses his mind.

A man in his 60's, on a date with a girl in her 20's, shouts an obscenity. His date politely looks down, not fully understanding.

The +16 jersey number guy sits in silence, not willing to give a hint to his inner emotions. Even here, by himself, there will be no concession. None.

* * *

Your a Lakers fan, on this night. Or a Shaq-hater. Or a Kobe lover.

Your guy has overseen the worst home loss in LA Lakers history. You are praying you don't miss the playoffs for the 2nd time in 3 years.

This is your world; these are your fears.

There will be no titles, no cavalry coming over the hill.

A world not of thriving, but survival. At best."

 

Re: KOBE leads LAL to historic depths - Nationally Televised humiliation

Made some changes to the first post