The Continued Pussification of American Youth

How the hell is Red Rover racist?

 

He's wrong. The ACLU got it stopped for discriminating against Socialists.

 

And that's just sad. Truth is, the "Continued Pussification Pussification of American Youth" is a direct result of parents and schools being afraid of getting sued because America has turned into a lazy-ass country. Few people want to work for their money anymore. They just want to strike it rich in one fell swoop. To me, it all goes back to when that person sued McDonald's because they spilled coffee on themselves and got burned. McDonald's had to pay and it was game over. Now, i'm young so it could have started before then, but that's my earliest memory of people deciding they were going to get money the wrong way.

When I was growing up, we played Smear the Queer, we played Wall Ball (like Hot Ass that Beef03 mentioned), we played tag football, red rover, duck-duck-goose, whatever. We had this one game we played where there was a giant hill and you had to tackle the kid on top to become King of the Hill. People got hurt but no one cared. We just played. And no one got sued.

 

Yeah, King of the Hill ... don't forget Kick the Can, War and Cowboys and Indians.

 

This is not a new phenomenon.

Quite a few years ago I got kicked out of an after-school junior high floor hockey league for smacking a kid in the head with my plastic stick after he purposely smacked me in the shins twice.

I told him not to do it again. He didn't listen.

If you can't hit a guy in the head with a stick, what good is sports?

 

And we wonder why America's youth is obese. Don't play at all at school. No activity. Sit in the corner and suck your thumb. That way nobody gets hurt or sued. And kids get fat ...

 

When I was 11, my friend stole a couple pairs of boxing gloves from who-the-hell-knows-where, so whenever anybody starting arguing, somebody got the bright idea to have us throw the gloves on and settle it that way. Three knockdowns, you win. All disputes, no matter how minor -- bring out the gloves. It was fun, and nobody stayed mad. You go down thrice, you lose. Simple as that. (One rule: no groin shots.)

Didn't take long before we set up our own faux-ring behind his house. Had a bell and stools (we even got a girl to parade a sign around one time!) and tried to stage the damn thing like Mike Tyson's Punchout or something. I get in there with a kid who's smaller than me but a loudmouth who had no balls. Always cut and run with his damn mouth, and would always back down if he was challenged. A complete Mariotti. ... It was his house we were in back of, though. ...

Ding-ding-ding. POP!
First punch broke his nose. Blood everywhere.

Overbearing Mama comes out and starts verbally assaulting me, chases me down the street (we all took off, naturally), screamin' like I killed him. Wouldn't let us hang out with him anymore (not that I minded.) ... And that was the end of our boxing days. :'(

That kid deserves to be in this thread. Fucker.

 

We had this one kid named Alan in our gym class my freshman year, a total dickhead who liked to talk a lot of shit but wouldn't back it up.

One day we had a substitute gym teacher, some old salty fuck that at one time coached college football the next town over. He didn't know about the "no head shots" rule, so it didn't apply that day. We also told him we couldn't find the regular balls (we hid them in a supply closet six rooms over) so we'd just have to use the volleyballs.

We headhunted ol' Alan all fucking hour.

 

Ok, I'm with everyone on this.

My kids used to play hockey on rollerblades at the local school. They'd take over the tennis courts, take down the nets and play for hours on end. Day  after day. And they knew how to turn the lights on when it got dark.

Now, this is a group of ten or twelve 16 year old kids on roller blades playing hockey with no helmets, no pads and they were going 100 miles an hour.

Played all the time and one kid playing goal got a ball in the nuts. Other than that, they all came home safe and sound.

I find all this "someone might get hurt" shit incomprehnsible. Crap like this makes me wanna go Hondo.

Oh, and it happens in schools up here.

 

That's wonderful stuff.

 

Oh well, they're just building up anger in certain kids who'll take it out on their opponents in high school football and then their wives and kids after that.

The only other thing we should do, along those lines, is to starting building more jail space now.

 

USA TODAY's getting a letter to the editor from me on this one. God, this is ridiculous. You wanna combat childhood obesity (an overrated topic if ever there was one), and then you take away the things that could make them lose weight.

Left hand, meet right hand. Work together on this one instead of separately.