The Famous Saugage Race just got a bit spicier

According to my father, they have sold chorizo at Miller Park all this season. And since I'm in Milwaukee visiting my parents and we are heading to the ballgame this afternoon, I'll be sure to sample one and give everyone my gastronomic impressions later today or tomorrow.

 

I bought some chorizo at the store once and the ingredients listed pig salivary glands and spleen.


Never. A. Fucking. Gain.

 

The way the Crew has been playing lately, the sausage race might be the best part of the game.

 

I know how you feel.. For Super Bowl, I ordered a coney island kit from a place in Detroit. First ingredient in the chili package? Beef Heart....
So when you next dig into a coney dog in Metro Airport as your changing from one plane to another as you travel across the Nation, think about it...

 

Chorizo should appeal. The sombrero isn't aerodynamic.

 

This is the most-appropriate place for "don't ask, don't tell."

 

By EMILY FREDRIX

Associated Press Writer

MILWAUKEE — It could have been wurst. On his first outing as the newest sausage at Miller Park, chorizo didn't fall on his buns.

Wearing an oversized brown sombrero and a bright yellow shirt emblazoned with the No. 5, Chorizo became the fifth pork product to join the famed sausage races at every Milwaukee Brewers home game.

He signed a contract with Brewers general manager Doug Melvin at a news conference at the stadium and then trotted around the bases.

Chorizo, also known as "El Picante," will race for the first time on Saturday against the other sausages — Italian, bratwurst, Polish and hot dog. But that'll be the only time this year he runs in the Klement's Sausage races, which have taken place every home game since 2000.

Chorizo will be put through the grind in the minor league, so he can get some extra seasoning before rejoining the other sausages next season, Melvin said.

Chorizo said through an interpreter his dream has come true.

"I am very humbled to be in the presence of so many world-class wieners, but hopefully I can bring a little something new to the table, and Brewers fans will welcome me into their hearts and grills," Chorizo said in a statement that was read in both English and Spanish.

***OK, too funny.

 

Waitress: "Would you like to hear about our specials?"

Jonathan Mardukus and Jack Walsh are hungry, seemingly broke, (Mardukus has the money belt he produces later for Jack) and a bit out of sorts in Amarillo, which, unfortunately, they made with mountains sted the prairie of the panhandle.

Mardukus nods.

Waitress: "Well, we have chorizo and eggs."

Mardukus: "Chorizo and eggs?"

Waitress: "It's a Mexican sausage, and it comes with eggs and hash browns."

Walsh: "We won't be having that."

Mardukus: "How much is the coffee?"

Waitress: "Fifty-three cents."

Mardukus: "And how much is the tea?"

Waitress: "Fifty-three cents."

Mardukus: "I'll have tea .... cigarettes. We're starvin', and you're smokin' fuckin' cigarettes?"

Walsh: "Hey, I need these cigarettes. You can have what you're having, and I'll have this."

Of course ...

It doesn't quite measure up to DeNiro, as Jack Walsh, saying, "You're goddamn right. Now here come two words for you. Shut the fuck up."

 

Is Chorizo the first player to come over in a pending deal for Carlos Lee?