10 Least Scary Horror Movies

I saw the exorcist when I was about 11 at a slumber party. I still don't like horror movies.

 

Next on IFC: "Bully" -- and I think we all know who stars in that.

(I'll give you a hint, he was good in "The Client")

 

Ian McKellan?

 

He was great in Lord of the Rings!

 

Bijou Phillips?

SHIT. Not a he.

 

Nick Stahl?

 

I don't know if this counts, but The Blair Witch Project was the dumbest movie I've ever had the misfortune to see. All of my friends claimed it was absolutely terrifying, I laughed through the final 15 minutes because it was so stupid.

 

My friends said the same things.

Not. Scary. At. All. I wanted my money back after seeing it.

 

Blair Witch Project.
I'm still waiting for something to happen.

 

I've never left a theater more pissed off than I was after watching the Blair Witch Project. Waste of time.

Halloween III was so weird ... it made no sense whatsoever, had nothing to do with the rest of the series. Not even sure why it was made.

 

I have to echo the Blair Witch Project, as well as Pern's take on The Exorcist. At least with The Exorcist, I could see why, at one point in time, it was groundbreaking and messed with people. With Blair Witch, it was simply a whole lot of nothing.

Signs might also get a nod for its awful, total letdown of a climax. It had a bunch of buildup, and then it was as if they just ran out of film and had to end it. Though, I don't know if that is considered a horror movie anyway.

 

Halloween III was made solely to keep cashing in on the franchise, which they thought was dead as there was no new Michael Myers-based script. The next Halloween movie didn't come out until six years later in 1988.

The movie is not at all scary, but is hilarious. The scenes in the toy factory with the random henchmen chipping off pieces of Stonehenge are too funny and the music is legendarily good/awful. The "cliffhanger" ending is perfect, too. Perhaps my all-time favorite guilty pleasure.