A place for open letters to the good people of the world.

Dear editors,

After covering pretty much the bulk of an entire state basketball tournament by myself and trying to get together previews for a spring sports season that starts in about nine days, asking me about some stupid cheesy ass profile pieces is not the move right now.

Fuck off,

One annoyed SS.

 

If it's your turn at the intersection, GO! You aren't being nice by letting me sit here and decide if you're waiting on me.

 

Dear MCbamr,
Please use proper letter-writing style.

Thanks. :-D

KY

 

Dear Versatile, et al:

Keebler's Grasshoppers are pretty close to the Thin Mint recipe, if not identical. (Keebler is one of the Girl Scouts' cookie manufacturers.)

Yours in gaining weight,
wicked

 

wick,

I remember when Grasshoppers used to be like mint Oreos, with the creme between two cookies.

Missing those and feeling old,

IJAG

 

Dear wicked,

Grasshoppers are less minty and less crunchy than Thin Mints. They're good, though.

But I'm getting my cookies for free.

Sincerely,

Verse

 

Dear Versatile,

Quit drafting my gig.

Hungrily for cookies,

 

Dear board,

Outing alert: 93Devil is Tom Waits.

Sincerely,

Verse

 

Dear Eilen Jewell:

Until you came on Pandora a few minutes ago, I had never heard of you. Now I need you to get more famous so I can use a celebrity crush exemption.

Yours in alt-folky admiration
Dixiehack

 

Dear Board,

Please send good wishes these meds start working. It's getting worse, and it's starting to feel like when I had pneumonia a couple years ago. Can't get a deep breath, everything hurts. This is a VERY important week, so I need to start feeling better like yesterday.

Thanks,

IJAG

 

Ms. ILAG,

Could allergies be your problem right now? Changing the air filters in your house might help if you have not.

Yours in the spring,

Pollen

 

93Bevil,

No. I have allergies. I know what those are. This is runny nose, sneezing, fever, coughing, difficulty breathing ... the flu. Just afraid my symptoms have swerved into p-land.

IJAG