A place for open letters to the good people of the world.

Dear Lord,

I have enough to say Grace over right now between all the stuff going on with my family and myself, but if you could, please take care of my grandmother. She's 100 years old and not doing too well and this could be the beginning of the end with her. If it is, just let her go peacefully and into the sweet reward of Heaven that she richly deserves.

Thanks,

Joseph

 

Dear Bodie,

Are you telling me there are other airports as insane as SEATAC is between, oh, 9 p.m. and midnight? I've landed there during that time frame a couple times and it was a crazed mob scene. Huge lines just to get aboard the subway-style shuttle cars, let alone trying to leave the place.

Good thing the airline suits are all about customer service ...

Sincerely,

I Should Coco

 

Coco,

I have flown into four airports that late (LAS, JFK, DTW, and SEA) and of the four LAS was the most laid back.

Bodie

 

Dear crazy dreams I'm having,

You don't think I have enough to worry about right now? Go away.

KG

 

Dear board,

Phone interview in 11 minutes. Then, afterward, perhaps a libation to celebrate surviving the "week" part of this week. Still two more days of work to go.

Wish me luck on both counts?

IJAG

 

Dear HR folks,

My resume is very clear. There are bullet points. Included in each of those are the aspects of my job. Things I do for a living. The skills I have, and the responsibilities I have.

When you call me, do not make me work backward through my resume so I can "tell you what I did at XXXX." Read the form in front of you, then ask follow-up questions.

Thanks,

IJAG

 

dear ijag - you're hired!!! hugs- tomas.

 

IJAG,

I'd hire you so fast your head would spin. Hope it went well.

Regards,

Joseph

 

IJAG,

Hope it went well!

Beaker

 

Dear roommate,

I already have enough tough decisions staring me in the face, don't make this one even more difficult.

wick

 

Dear Skybeam Internet Service:

Your customer service department is an abortion. Everyone in your company can fuck off and die in a fire. I wish I had a job where I could take people's money and not provide a service like you do.

I'd like to beat the last "customer service" rep I talked to into a fucking coma.

Do you make your employees take a class in order to learn how to be five-alarm flaming assholes or do you recruit that kind of talent off the street?

Have a nice day.

 

Dear voting results,

Please finish coming so I can update you on our website, go home, sleep, wake up, then write my five features and column this week.

Yours truly,