A place for open letters to the good people of the world.

Dear Spup,

Spup: That's great to hear. Pray for the rest of us

Thanks!
Tommy_D

 

Dear TBF,

This is wonderful. You're going to be a fantastic father, and your wife is lucky to have you, too.

Sincerely,
Xan

 

Dear person I cover,

I realize you're currently in a different time zone than I. I also would like to point out that I've been attempting to set up a phone interview with you for nearly two weeks.

Therefore, I would like to think we could have found a time more conducive to both of us than you calling me at 12:48 a.m. ET. But I appreciate at least getting it out of the way.

Thank you,

IJAG

 

Dear water,


Fuck you.


Never to forget,
Pilot's oak nightstand


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Dear shitty glass coasters from pilot's ex-girlfriend's mom,

Fuck you.

Ever pissed,
Pilot

 

Dear hangover,

GO THE FUCK AWAY!

Sincerely,
Tommy_D

 

T_D,

Stop drinking so much.

Sincerely,
Hangover

 

T_D,

Ignore t_b_f. He gives you bad counsel.

Here's your 4 word hangover cure:

Hair o' the dog

Cheers,

Cap K

 

Dear world,

Mom says she'll pay off my credit cards if I'll go to law school. This has prompted some serious reflection about my life and how I'm living it.

Love

SC

 

Dear SC,

Law school is for lawyers. You're a goddamn sportswriterchick.

Now buck up and format that agate!

Sincerely,
One of your sportswriting brethren

 

Dear Xan,

I've been thinking about law school for almost 10 years now. Maybe it's time to bite the bullet and just do it. I could be a better sports agent than Scott Boras!

Yours in sports,

SC

 

Dear Xan,

Scott Baio could be a better sports agent than Scott Boras, FWIW.

Good luck in your decision process. But we're pulling for you to stay on our team.

With love for pencil fighting,
Xan

 

Dear boss,

Way to write a letter to yourself.

Faithful employee