A place for open letters to the good people of the world.

To USAirways, please bugger yourself with a rusty pitchfork and die. Right now.

Your airplanes are as cramped as a typical D-II locker room and about as antiquated, your employees are dumb as ditch carps, with personalities as sour as the smell in my armpit right now as I sit through another 6-hour layover.

In addition, you've canceled dozens of flights today and your ticket kiosks don't work any better than my 1978 Chevrolet Chevette did back in the day.

In short, you suck heaping vats of donkey scrotum on every conceivable level and should have been out of business years ago.

And on top of that, your mother is so fat that when she sits around the house, she sits around the house.

Best,

Lono

 

Dear older person on desk,

Either get with the technology and learn how to do more when you're the slot or DONT DO IT!

Sincerely,
Tommy_D

 

Dear Tommy,

It's bad enough you're a Cowboys fan, but what's with the TO sig? No Glenn or Romo pics you can stick in there?

Write-Brained

 

Dear WB,

Sorry for the eyesore. I lost a small bet. It'll be gone within the week.

 

Dear UT,
Thanks for starting this thread.
In admiration,
Joe

 

Dear Hummer,
Thank you for not running my little car off the road, despite its ant-like appearance to your hulking body. You got really close earlier and kind of scared me, but I appreciate it just being one of those 'psyche!' moves. Work was glad I arrived alive today.
Forever,
Diabeetus

 

Dear Joe,

You're welcome. It's been fun.

UT

 

Dear UTshooter;

When your time allows, please don't hesitate to post some more of your work on the photo thread in the Journalism board.

Thanks!

Platy

 

Platy,

I don't see that there's a lot of demand on the board for that particular thread. I had hoped other people who are both shooting and writing would post, and I don't want it to become the running, "Look at what UT shot today" thread.

UT

 

Dear UT,

Understandable. I thought that thread would get an incredible amount of traction. Apparently not.

Disappointedly,

Platy

 

Platy,

You would.

Mayfly

 

Mayfly,

1) I would what? and

2) Why would I what?

Stumped,

Platy