Chess

HOOOORAY! I broke my nine-game losing streak just now...... because the guy I was playing had to go to class and quit. It counts as a win though. I'm now 9-24. Go me.

 

Was it his turn for show-and-tell today?

 

No, smartass, his mom had to burp him and change his diaper.

 

Not that anybody probably cares, but I'm finally getting my record better. I'm up to 33-70, which is almost have as many wins as losses. Sounds horrible, but if you knew where I was coming from you'd understand. And my rating is almost back up to the 1200 you start out with, having fallen into the low 800s at different times.

 

Necro-bump!

Tomorrow, I earn my latest nerd merit badge and play in an official, US Chess Federation rated chess tournament.

I'm paying $100 (plus hotel, and USCF membership, and buying all my equipment for the tournament) and giving up a weekend for the privilege of being knocked around the board by 10-year-olds for six consecutive rounds. One of the lesser-known facets of chess is that it's much like learning a foreign language: children have a huge advantage and are often better than adults.

And to complete the pointlessness, all that entry fee goes to prize money for which I'm not eligible because I'm an unrated player in the lowest section (they don't want internet superstars to enter a big tournament with their first entry and smack a round the lowest section and pick up the easy prize money).

You don't even want to know how much I had to bargain away with Mrs. Stain in order to convince her to let me spend about $300 and spend an entire weekend away for this.

 

Well Rick, one night in Bangkok, and the world's your oyster.

 

This is just cool to me.

 

It's the ultimate test of cerebral fitness

 

Okay, here's the rundown.

Round 1, played a guy maybe a little younger than me in a Cubs hat. Accepted a draw offer when I might have been winning, but I really didn't want to go 0-fer the tournament.

Round 2: Made a stupid mistake very early in the game. Considered asking for a do-over. Remembered there are no do-overs. Resigned after about 15 minutes and went to lunch.

Round 3: Played a woman about my age, lost a close and exciting match.

Round 4: Played a smoking hot foreign woman (later google-stalking reveals she's a swiss mathematics PhD). Played a long, intense match where I tried very hard not to get caught staring at her boobs while simultaneously staring at her boobs as much as I possibly could. Was thankful to be playing a game where expected posture is to be staring down intently. Was about to lose when she Cutlered the game right to me.

Also at the tournament are about a dozen grandmasters, including a former challenger to Garry Kasparov in a world championship match. It's funny to see the tables full of professional chess players and they honestly looked like a group of sportswriters with a few high school prodigies mixed in. A few well-dressed, a few in dirty jeans and a t-shirt, some young, some old.

 

This thread is back to life? Awesome! I never did find a good alternative to yahoo chess. I hate playing there. So many dickheads. But I can't find anyplace else with so many people, and anyway I imagine there are asses on every site.

Good for you, Rick. Sounds like a fun tournament. I've never entered one. I'd love to though at some point. Hopefully I'll play some smokin' hot PhD foreigner. Did you get her number?

 

Chess.com, Rusty.

 

And you just invented a new word that should be put in the next edition of Webster's: Cutlered.

They can put a picture of an interception right next to it.