College basketball coaching carousel

Illinois AD: Fuck it. Call the Ohio coach. NO, I DON'T KNOW HIS NAME!! LOOK IT UP!!

 

They've already gone after two former Florida assistants, why not John Pelphrey?

The guy can recruit.

 

Groce: "Hi Mike I'm John...."

Mike Thomas: "Yeah yeah yeah. Listen, do you have a dead kid in your trunk?"

Groce: "Huh?"

Mike Thomas: "DO YOU HAVE A DEAD KID IN YOUR TRUNK?"

Groce: "No, no."

Mike Thomas: "Have you ever know about one of your staff members raping little boys in your locker room?

Groce: "What the fuck?"

Mike Thomas: "ANSWER ME!"

Groce: "No!"

Mike Thomas: "You're hired."

 

Which coaches are known for recruiting Chicago well? Thad Matta? Buzz Williams? Tom Crean? Mike Brey? Oliver Purnell?

I'm asking, I don't know the answer.

 

The funniest thing about coaching searches, especially one's that "go bad", are the message board denizens from, well, pretty much every school that exists, feverishly typing agape as they realize their school isn't the destination job they thought it was. This goes for schools big and small.

I've seen it in the league I cover and pretty much everywhere else. So-and-so is "beneath" being hired.

Yeah. Because you were all going to get Coach K.

 

Yes.

Illinois football coaching search a few months ago.

Not a good time for the Illini lately. Unless you coach in the MAC.

 

I don't know if there's that "one" coach who does Chicago well. But if you're a coach at a school in the Midwest, you'd better have an in.

 

Among the many reasons the Illinois job is not a top destination is the issue of Chicago. Illinois fans expect their coach to be able to waltz in and get anyone he wants, when in fact you have to have someone (preferably an assistant) to go in and grease all the right palms so the self-professed kingmakers of Chicago basketball will grant you an audience. If you don't watch it at Illinois, those folks can end up running the program for you.

Plus, Chicago is as mentally connected to Champaign-Urbana as it is to Tuscaloosa. No one in Chicago grows up dreaming of playing for Illinois. Given Chicago's view of the rest of the state, a lot of them couldn't tell you where the hell Champaign is.

 

Boyd Grant is still available. And alive. At least I think he is.

 

As far as a coach recruiting Chicago, the best at it is probably John Calipari, because he can get the best player. (Imagine Jabari Parker in Kentucky blue in two years.) For the most part, though, Chicago is a very shallow pool of talent for its size. The top half of the Big Ten had a collective seven players from Chicago on their rosters, and Wisconsin had four of them. And none of those players were more than scrubs. And I'm also stretching Chicago to the deepest 'burbs, which are where most of these players are from.

Illinois had six players from Chicago, and they really didn't contribute much.

 

Jimmy Collins played that role beautifully for Lou Henson back in the 80s/90s.

 

I remember hearding that Crean and Matta were the best at recruiting Chicago and when you have guys like Dwyane Wade and Evan Turner, that can be hard to argue.

Apparently Seth Davis called Illinois a top 10 program, so I'm not as embarrassed about my top 20 proclamation that I have since backed away from.

I think the Ohio coach is a former Matta assistant, so that might make a teeny bit of sense.

It sounds like it's a done deal.