College football 2020 offseason thread

thank god i am muted on my conference call

 

The MAD Magazine song parodies from my childhood obviously struck a very deep chord in my mental ... um, quick wit. What, me worry?

 

"And later that night when the Victory Bell rang
Could it be the shortness of breath and loss of smell they'd been feelin'?"

 

We can do this, people.

"Does any one know where the love of God goes
When the fever, chills and nausea turn the minutes to hours?
The searchers all say they'd have made Covid pay
If they'd put fifteen more more days of mask wearin' behind 'er"

 

In a musty newsroom in Det-roy-it they typed
For each man on a Big-One-Gee roster
COVID-19, it's said
Never gives up her dead
When the games of November come stealin'

 

You really think an SEC school isn't going to make an exception for football? Even at Vandy?

 

I think they will, which is why I think they've made an error with this definitive statement. They should have corrected it by now. If the possibility of football exists, the possibility of university-sponsored travel exists.

 

Well, the NAIA's Frontier Conference has joined the crowd, changing their mind and pushing football to spring:

Frontier Conference changes direction, will play football in the spring

My son plays for Carroll College in Montana, and the five Montana schools were still planning to play each other home and away this fall. Their first practice was scheduled Saturday; so much for that! Personally, I'm not surprised and in some ways relieved, because I wasn't sure how it was going to work.

I'm also not sure how playing in the spring is going to work, especially during the lovely March weather of Montana. I guess they'll cross that bridge when they get to it.

 

Hmmm.

NCAA president: “We cannot, at this point, have fall NCAA championships”

 

The legend lives on from Huntsville on down
Of the football coach they called Bear
The Huskers it is said always support Big Red
When hopes in November turn gloomy
With four likely champions plus 60 more
The Commodores always come up empty
The pandemic sunk the schedule and the games couldn't be viewed
They wished the election in November would come early
The Wolverines were the pride of the Great Lakes side
Coming back from some win in Wisconsin
As the big programs go it was richer than most
With a coach and good captain well seasoned
With scandals galore, the Buckeyes came for more
From a city south of Cleveland
And later that night when the Monon bell rang
Could it be the sanctions they'd been feelin'?
ESPN talking heads made a tattle-tale sound
And drunk fans over the railing
And every man knew, as the captain did too,
T'was the referees come stealin'
The dawn came late and the tailgating had to wait
When the gales of November came slashin'
When afternoon came it was acid rain
In the face of EPA deregulation
When suppertime came, the PR man came into the box sayin'
Fellas, we don't have the budget to feed ya
At seven p.m., a the kickoff began and the coach said
Fellas, it's been good to know ya
The captain radioed to the sidelines
But he got intercepted and the game was in peril
And later that night as the ACC parties were outta sight
Came the rambling wreck of Georgia Tech

 

The players tried to take the field. The COVID-19 refused to yield.

That’s all I’ve got.