Colonoscopy ... give me good vibes

Oh, you'll get a lot of shit done. No worries.

 

If you double dip and do both, be sure to ask the doctor to change scopes before the endo. It will amuse him, as he'll never have heard that one before.

 

I’ve had one, and Prep Day for me was on the Sunday to Spring Forward, so I lost an hour of time to suffer.

I asked my primary care doctor for any tips and she said to eat light for a couple of days before and drink a lot of clear liquids. So, on Friday, I skipped snacks and desserts. On Saturday, I bought two large yellow Gatorade bottles and started drinking one. For both breakfast and lunch, I ate a Jimmy Dean sausage, egg and cheese muffin. For dinner that night, I had a whole can of beef soup. For Prep Day Sunday, I drank a large mug of black coffee with sugar for breakfast around 9-10 a.m., started drinking the second bottle of Gatorade in between, then had a whole can of chicken broth around 1-2 p.m. I was not hungry at all during the weekend.

I had Plenvue as my prep drink, and was nervous about it. But I didn’t think it was as bad as I expected. I kept it chilled in the fridge and freezer, alternated drinking it with the Gatorade and watched college basketball. I then tried timing the trips to the bathroom for the commercials in the NCAA Selection Show.

I was fairly cleaned out by 11 p.m. that night. Woke up in the morning; went to the procedure. Asked the anesthesiologist how long it would take to knock me out, and he replied, “five seconds.” Woke up with my belly hurting, from the air that was pumped in during the procedure. Doc said everything was fine; no polyps. The pain went away during the trip home. Had a light lunch, took a nap and was fine afterward.

 

Yeah, I forgot to mention that. About the only thing that helps the prep is to chill the hell out of it. It's still nasty but it helps.

A little.

 

I've probably had four myself. The prep isn't my concern. The result is my concern. And I know I'm getting ahead of myself.

 

Colon cancer is very treatable. Really treatable.

But that depends upon early detection.

So go get checked and we'll deal with the results when we get them.

We're here for you.

 

That means more than you know, Az. And that first paragraph is the money shot. That's what I need to keep in mind. Thanks.

 

All you can do is wait for Path. It's going to take three or four days probably, for a quick result. More like a week most times. Lab has to come back, Doctor reviews it, then they call you. Try to just relax and wait for it. It's actually better news if it's a little slow. It's the bad news labs that get put on the top of the stack.

Edit: I'm a dinosaur. It's all electronic anymore, there isn't a stack of charts to review. I'm sure that abnormal labs are automatically flagged for attention, though. Amounts to the same thing.

 

Have a major family history with colon cancer, so they started me out on the colonoscopies at age 45. All clear so far, but also terrified until the moment I get the all-clear message a few days later. So I feel you, jr.

Just try to remember that you are doing the best thing/only thing you can do at this point, in getting the procedure done. What comes next will come next, and you can tackle that when it's in front of you - with the overwhelming likelihood that there will be nothing to tackle.

At my last one, I woke up mid-procedure. As I realized I was watching a huge high-def video feed of the inside of my colon, I asked the doctor if I was supposed to be awake and watching this. He gave me the most dismissive scoff I think I've ever heard, and said, "You're fine." Felt like a complete pansy.

 

I woke up during my first one, but I was so bombed out of my mind that I didn’t care.