Crossed Giblets of Death: The SJ Thanksgiving Family Therapy Thread

I will pass this along to my brother, when the medication wears off.

'Alex dear, I would never dream of following you into the bathroom, what lovely towels 21 has, did you see these towels? I just wanted a moment to talk privately, we used to have such wonderful talks, remember how we used to talk, you were so worried you'd never grow any hair on your body, and now look at you, it's as if there's not a razor in the whole world! Dear, about Marcee, such a beautiful girl, and so wonderful that she loves so many different foods, I have never SEEN a woman eat the entire turkey gizzard, that was just so impressive, but every day I hear something new about how hard it is for young women to lose weight after a certain age, I never had that problem, I have such a terrific metabolism, you know I lose four pounds while I was pregnant with you, in those days we really watched our weight, so I wonder dear, what are your thoughts on the sweatpants, I know you loved Disneyworld on your honeymoon and how wonderfully sentimental that she wants to wear the Mickey Mouse sweatpants for you, that must feel so special to you, is that something you discuss, dear? Did you try the salad, I thought Marcee might enjoy it, maybe you'd like to take it home?....

 

My ex-wife came over at 7 a.m. and used my kitchen to make dinner. She made every blessed dish except for the stuffing (I made it), basically barring me from my own kitchen. Meanwhile, my son and I played Star Wars and watched Jurassic Park, etc.

After eating, my ex passed out on my love seat for two hours while my son and I continued to play until it was time for both of them to visit my ex-in-laws.

But when the day was all said and done, it was my son and I watching episodes of the Backyardigans and eating apple pie until we got sleepy.

 

We went to a restaurant. By getting there early, I managed to place myself at the head of the table, so I got to avoid most of the people that I didn't want to talk to. Realtively low key -- my daughter was perfect and even ate a bunch of turkey and stuffing. The wine was cheap, but halfway decent. The highlight came at the end. They added the tip because we were such a large party and the money collected by everyone was $12 over the total on the bill. When I suggested that we leave the extra for the server, because he was friendly and had to deal with five kids under 5 years old, you would have thought that I floated the idea of watching kiddie porn. After much screaming and yelling, I returned the money to those who wanted it and threw a couple of 20 dollar bills for the waiter. Thank God that this is only once a year.

 

that's just fabulous.

 

Wow, what a meal last night. I must of had at least 95 slices of pumpkin pie. Whitlock ain't got nothin' on me.

 

Another sucky Thanksgiving (sigh).

Things were supposed to be looking up. My wife graduated with her bachelor's degree in less than a month. She is loved by all (especially her students and staff where she is student-teaching). Unfortunately, it's a small town and there are no openings.

She interviewed at our main town two weeks ago. Figured to be a shoo-in. Got a "Dear John" letter three days later (and one day after sending 'Thank You' notes to everyone at the interview).

So now it's back to the local grocery store for her, where she's been working part-time to help ends meet (They still don't).

I have a new boss I can't stand (and he can't stand me), and I think is trying to run me off so he can bring in his friends (he alluded to that very notion).

If I don't have rent in six days, we're evicted (two months behind). I'm waiting to hear froom our church if they will help us. Oh, and the phone company called again today. They want their money, too.

Did I mention Christmas is a month away? I can't wait.

 

Crippler: I am sending my mother right over.

 

And the Amyloidmobile is dead. broken timing chain. A thousand clams just to go in there and see what's wrong.
I now own a 4000-pound paperweight with a decent radio.

 

RIP Amyloidmobile.

 

But at least he knows where his papers are.

 

My papers are in order.

 

I'm going to get the paper.
Get the paper.