Deadspin: Manti Te'o's dead girlfriend story was a hoax

Awesome.

 

It never ends.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=yJIvZpjHzuA#!

 

That's kinda fascinating, if true. Did Maui'a imagine that meeting, or is there some beautiful tall babe out there that was actually going around posing as Kekua?

Sounds like Tuiasopo might've gone to some shockingly elaborate lengths to perpetrate this hoax. Why, I don't understand.

 

Teammate says he spoke on the phone with her. Sorry, "her."

http://abcnews.go.com/US/manti-teo-hoax-fresh-details-emerge-complex-scam/story?id=18248408

 

Is anybody going to put their fucking name to a quote in this story? I mean, Jesus Christ already, it's not a national security story. "I talked on the phone to her" gets a non-for-attribution courtesy? That's fucking ridiculous. Come on, ABC.

I mean, the big come-to-Jesus, woe-is-us, we-need-to-improve-our-methods moment for sports journalism ... and one outlet after another quoting anonymous sources about every banal detail.

 

Finally the definitive commentary:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=da_2ZAOsoSs

 

I find this amusing - they were raising money in the non-existent person's name:

http://www.washingtonpost.com/sports/colleges/notre-dame-alum-who-launched-fundraiser-in-memory-of-teo-girlfriend-shell-shocked-by-hoax/2013/01/17/3800aa00-60e7-11e2-bc4f-1f06fffb7acf_story.html

 

even a fake girlfriend is hotter than a Michigan woman

 

The details emerging from this just amaze me. Why would anyone go to such lengths just to get jollies off scamming a football star? I mean, if you're that fucking devious, shouldn't you be using your evil powers to steal money or something?

It also increasingly sounds like the early theories and suspicions advanced here are unfounded, and Te'os story is basically the truth. It wasn't a beard/gay situation, Te'o wasn't in on it from the start. But he was a pathetically naive dupe to be conned so thoroughly.

Is this the weirdest sports story since Harding gilloolied Kerrigan?

 

No, Penn State is all-time weird.

 

True. But I almost put that in a different category because of the tragic enormity of it.

The redeeming thing about this is that nobody was seriously hurt by any of it. The primary wound is basically just embarrassment to a few, offset by great amusement to millions of others. Nobody was amused by Penn St. This is a huge story almost purely because of it's extraordinary weirdness, not because of its gravity. In that respect it reminds more of Tonya Harding.