Dear dimwit on the phone

I highly doubt that, because the guy said the paper had already been read and there were other sections -- comics is one he mentioned -- that were missing.

I was about to ask if he'd like one mailed to him, but he hung up before I could get the question out.

 

Yeah. Callers tend to be anxious on the phone. Working in tech support I realized--sometimes they don't give you the opportunity to make it right and then bitch because you didn't give them anything.

 

Dear wrestling parent:
Don't call the news editors and ask why your club meeting announcement didn't run, even though you said you called us and we never returned your call and we never ran it.

First of all, when you call, it helps if you leave a NAME and NUMBER. We're over our limit at Psychic Friends Network for the month due to the election, and that's how we usually figure such things out. Second, try clicking on that button labeled SEND when you do write them. Otherwise, they don't get here.

 

Bit off topic, but after working for too many years in retail, there could be a thread titled "Dear idiot on the other side of the counter."

Ugh.

 

http://notalwaysright.com/

 

The video game focused Acts of Gord:

http://www.actsofgord.com/

 

Dear Grandparent,

If your grand kid was born, grew up and went to school in Illinois, this kid is not a local kid and does not get his/her college accomplishments in our paper. Instead of calling us here at Podunk, tell your son/daughter to call Dumfock and have them publish your grandkid's accomplishments in college since he/she attended school and grew up there.

Thanks,
JF

 

But everyone is town is dying to know what their loser grandson is up to.

 

God, that reminds me of some of the obscure calls that I used to get. Someone would want a story on their wife's, sister's, cousin twice removed's kid from across the country. And yeah, they'd say, "Everyone knows little Johnny!"

To which I would respond, "Who's everyone? Give me names!" Followed by the other person mumbling.

 

One place I worked did a story on old guy's daughter who wrote a book, even though she'd never been to town. Using the same principle, I offered to do a story about my mom's trip to Italy, except she'd been to the town once. Still don't understand why I was shot down.

 

This is pretty common. Maybe instead of dismissing them, we should do this more, since grandparents are our most likely readers.

I can see a weekly section on what far-flung grandkids are up to these days.

 

"Johnny built a birdhouse today with glitter glue."