Deceptively dark movie endings

Still remember going to see it in the theatre when I was 13. Loved everything about the movie. Still do.

 

There’s probably a very good long form piece to be written comparing Dennis Quaid’s ability to find strong sports movies to be in (this, the express, the rookie, breaking away, any given Sunday, tough enough) to his brother Randy being in some of the worst (caddy shack 2, major league 2, the slugger’s wife, and balls out.) And yeah, Randy was the star in Dead Solid Perfect, and Kingpin, which is well, kingpin, and really owes its success to Murray and Harrleson.

 

Hell of a Tale of the Tape. Which Quaid's movie career would you rather have? And would you rather have a late in life conversion to faith - or fringe lunacy?

 

One can hope.

Listen, y'all, "The Banana Splits Movie" takes the cake. The 60s bubblegum Saturday morning kids show was re-imagined as the Banana Splits being maniacal killers in the 2019 re-boot. Groovy!

Anyway, the Banana Splits are dismembered at the end (OR ARE THEY?), and, no, I did not just literally read that on Wikipedia*, but the allegedly triumphant-ish finish really doesn't take into account the ramifications of their Pyrrhic victory over the evil Splits.

1. What if the Banana Splits were not killed, but rehabilitated? Then they could spread their infectious glee upon the world again! What a feel good story!
2. No one took into account that bubblegum classic "The Tra La La Song" has now been turned into a mournful dirge. That sucks. We want happy Splits riding around on go-karts at King's Island, not murdered Splits being worm food!
3. With their demise, the amount of times we'd hear a goofy sound effect to the vision of anthropomorphic animals hitting each other with a psychedelic cartoon hammer is cut by nearly 95%.
4. What of "Danger Island"? Will no one think of "Danger Island"? Don't even start with "The Arabian Knights".
5. Snorky's nose will honk no more.

This is some deceptively dark bullshit no one considered!

And no, I did not* pick out "The Banana Splits Movie" on purpose to make fun of the posts on here that ponder the fate of films that are mediocre as fuck in the first place. So, please, carry on discussing logical flaws in seminal works like "Inde-Fucking-Pendence Day".









* Hmm, maybe I did.

 

Schindler’s List when he broke down that he didn’t save more.

Dark to pitch black.

 

Never forget that Cousin Eddie molested his own daughter, but it was worth it for that one joke.

 

It’s Sophie’s Choice.

In Dennis’s corner, he starred in more movies and had a longer career than Randy. His film selection feels stronger. However, I always felt he was the poor man’s Kevin Costner. To put it in sports terms, he was the guy who played in six all star games, but always as an injury replacement.

In Randy’s corner, he is an original. His Cousin Eddie is an iconic character. His early career saw him in some movie classics: the Last Picture Show, Paper Moon, the Last Detail…but he was a supporting character in each…sometimes just in a few scenes. There was a lot dreck in the decades to come. In sports terms, he was the guy who had some key hits for some championship teams, but then bounced between bad teams and the minors for a decade before becoming a player-coach for an independent team.

 

Randy Quaid was great in The Paper, too.

 

From the same era, he was great in Quick Change as well.

 

Bubbler and Oscar Madison co-hosting a pop culture podcast. Who says no?

 

The Wizard of Oz. They're all dead, even the Munchkins.