ESPN's Britt McHenry is Not Nice....

One of my favourite off-board memories... At the tail end of an Outing in DC, maybe? (My memory really is shot.) I believe @FlyingHeadbutt and I are the only two people alive who have seen board immortals @IJAG and @ClubberSlang drunkenly grind on a dance floor. I literally fell off my barstool not long after.

I couldn't have known it at the time, but that was the happiest I would ever be.

 

Ron Howard voiceover: It wasn't.

 

I guess you did that right! We were with Mikey at an outing in 2009 or 2010. I think the last game was just us, our wives and Mikey. He's a total loser (he also probably never surfs here anymore, but I'm in constant touch with him so I'll be sure to let him know I'm badmouthing him).

 

Oh, and another. I put out an open call for a drunk in Minneapolis. Two posters answered. One, @swingline, drove a Cobra hundreds of miles from RedneckUSA to join in the festivities. He got there first. I told him another poster—whose board handle was a short, hard single syllable that I remember but will keep to myself—was coming. We decided said handle sounded like the name you'd give a really big shit. As in, "I just took a massive xxx."

She showed up and was an absolute knockout of a young woman. I didn't have the heart to tell her that we'd named poop after her.

 

The puke, she did flow.

 

Not to interrupt, but ...

 

The balcony is closed.

 

Oh, God. Now type is going to start talking about Ebert.

 

A new moment in this thing we call life: newspapermen fired for paying fake people to "like" them.

 

Is IJAG who Britt strives to be?? Looks and attitude??

 

You think so? I feel like I'd recognize the 80s pop culture references.