First-world problems

Landline phones with answering machines are Third World. Get with the program, MTM.

 

Or go really third world and add a SECOND landline, just for you.

 

This past weekend I made fancy challah bread french toast, bacon, squeezed orange juice, the whole nine yards for my family -- and didn't realize we didn't have syrup until everything was on the table. In addition to a first world problem, it was also a #fml moment.

 

So everyone was Extra Startled that day.

 

My local Wendy's got rid of its paper ketchup holders in favor of plastic medicine caps. Now I have to fill up three cups instead of unraveling one paper cup and dumping half of their ketchup dispenser into it.

 

Shooot. I just squirt a bunch on the tray!

 

Right on the tray? How uncivilized!

 

Well, on the paper placemat. The tray might not be too clean. Though now that I think of it, I don't know where the placemat's been either. Or the paper cups. Shit! Wendy's is off the list!

 

My local Wendy's ran out of cheese the other day.

They ran out of cheese at the cheeseburger store.

 

On a recent visit to Chipotle, they had a sign stating there were no carnitas then told me it would be 12 minutes before the chicken was ready. I couldn't wait and they refused to sell me the steak at the chicken price, which I thought would have been a nice gesture.

 

And my free drink for my birthday from Starbucks expired before I could use it.

 

Everyone knows to order the barbacoa.