Five-ring circus: The Thread of the XXXIII Olympiad

Just as the only reason to watch the Tour de France is for the aerial scenic beauty shots, the opening ceremony is designed for aerial shots of the beauty of central Paris. That's worth watching.

 

Saw an IG post from Andi Petrillo, who will host much of CBC's coverage from their studio in Toronto.

 

I always work up an "Opening Ceremony bingo" column for my readers with triggers like "unaccompanied child singing or acting," "flagbearer showing off and using one hand," "flagbearer is a canoeist" and "NBC broadcasters make light joke at the expense of obscure, underdeveloped country," among others.

I find it borderline miraculous they're even doing a live broadcast. Of all the Olympic stuff it feels like the Ceremony is the most timeshiftable.

 

Make it a drinking game and you might have something there.

 

I mean, you're free to do with the information what you want. We just don't want to be party to any lawsuits.

I'd be pretty surprised if Simone Biles wasn't the female flagbearer (after Tokyo they do one of each).

Another thing I was thinking about last night is who the final torchbearer will be.

Previously: 2020: Naomi Osaka, 2016: Vanderlei de Lima (Marathoner who got tackled by the defrocked Irish priest), 2012: Bunch of nondescript kids; 2008: Li Ning (gymnast and sports apparel magnate); 2004: Sailor who filled in after Kostas Kenteris bailed on a drug test.

I'm sure there are odds out there, but here's a few nominees:

Laure/Florent Manadou: French swimmers and siblings. Both have won gold medals.
Marie-Jose Perec: First person to double in the 200 and 400 (just before Michael Johnson in 1996) - problem is she's actually from Guadeloupe.
Claude Makelele: Only French footballer of much rapport who was actually an Olympian (1996) not counting the persona non grata Michel Platini (bribery) and his name is synonymous with a particular type of defensive midfielder. However, that's like being a legendary offensive lineman.
Jeannie Longo: French cyclist, won four medals at three Olympics and has competed in seven, but has significant doping baggage to her name

To some degree, I wonder if there's a chance they go "Fuck it, call Zidane". If I'm betting, I'd put it on "unknown kids."

 

Aren't the teams taking boat rides down the river, rather than marching into a stadium, for the opening ceremony?

 

Also true, but I think they do have to get off the boat and walk into a temporary stadium area in the Trocadero Gardens.

 

I assumed they are traveling by boat to the stadium. LeBron was an obvious choice for the US men. Track athlete for Local U will be carrying the flag. She was as surprised as anyone when they told her.

EDIT: International track athlete for Local U, that is.

 

It ain’t over ‘till the hip socket sings.

IYOYK

 

Why wouldn't fellow Olympians throw a bone to somebody whose sport isn't in the spotlight? Give 'em a day they'll treasure forever.

Like Biles and James need another honor.

 

When did the Olympics go to male and female flag bearers instead of a single carrier?

 

Give me Ryan Crouser!